your are not alone in feeling this. i dont trust anyone and if i do, i trust too quick and get hurt in the end !

I also have trust issues. Pretty much the only person I trust is my best friend, which is pretty sad because I have a husband.

Trust is the crux of things. People that talk there feelings are the ones to trust.

Big time trust issues here!

I am completely unable to trust because of the betrayal of my family. Somehow I have deveopled the ability to care deeply for others and I hope they will treat me right for a (period) of time, but I know all relationships will eventually come to an end. Sometimes the person leaves or sometimes I do something annoying to make them leave. Of course there are several times I never know why they left. No trust!

I had one friend on here that started off great. We gave each other a boost when the other one needed it. We joked and enjoyed our friendship. He told me over and over that no girl would ever come between our friendship. Within the first few weeks of knowing him, he had said that there would be no one to claim his body when he died. He didn't like the idea of being unclaimed like his brother. I found that sad, so being so BPD I promised to take care of his funeral and pay for it. I put aside 10,000 dollars in the bank that was growing for his possible death. He has had HIV for over 20 years. I had an extra top of the line Toshiba computer. I got it wiped clean as if new and sent it to him. My father inlaw had some left over phone cards from before his company swithched over to cell phones. I sent almost 70 30min. phone cards to him. Then he started asking for items. We knew he didn't have a lot of money, and the money he did have he wouldn't want to spend on personal items that he requested. We sent him those items requested-over fifty dollars worth. Then he started needing money. He said he was hungry. We sent him money. Once my mom gave me twenty bucks. I kept five and sent the rest to him because I thought he was struggling more than us. He came up with interesting stories looking back where he was in great financial difficulties and we sent him large sums of money. He said he didn't have anywhere to live so despite the fact that he had an extensive criminal record, was in recovery for drug abuse, and was HIV-(We did care but our families gave us hell) we invited him to live in our home. We even looked at purchasing a brand new RV so he could have privacy. We also had a contractor give us an estimate for completing our downstairs into a full apartment.
I found out he was talking trash about me and about how he was going to use me. When I asked him about it he hung up on me and started trashing me. He broke all ties with me and the last time we talked told me off. I told him, even though I knew you had said you were going to use me, I forgave you. When you were in need on the streets I looked for you. I was planning on not only spending thousands on your funeral-I'm sure he will live longer than me, but I had a contractor in to give me and estimate and looked at new RV's for you to live in. I took the criticizim of family for allowing him around our kids. I did all of this after I knew you had talked about me. I had forgiven you as part of my belief as a Christian. I'm not always the best Christian, but I am a Christian. He still talked crap about me and withdrew himself immediately from us and even made what can only be seen as a threat towards us in his journal.
I don't want him in my life, but as a BPD it is very hard to deal with such a quick retreat. I don't want him in my house especially with a violent past and a threat made to my family, but for some reason as a BPD it still hurts to put so much into a person and be treated so raw. No, I will never do that again.
I think that extra 10,000 in the bank will work out good for the hard times coming in our economy or for a new Saab. Of course I would trade in the one I have.
I hate when sudden voids make you empty inside even when you don't want the void filled with what was taken.
Okay, I was a fool. I did all of this because I saw someone who had changed their life around and I remembered how our friendship was in the beginning. I always had a friendly message to brighten my day or a phone call. So nice in the beginning. So how has this affected my already lack of trust-proven it. I did these things with out trust. I guess that is why I was able to forgive so many times and look past all the flaws, I don't trust anyone anyway. I just live and give. Well I don't give anymore and I barely want to live.
I was just thinking I am glad we don't have a gun in the house. So quick and final. I used to be afraid of guns, now I desire greatly to own one and hold it in my hand touching the cold metal. Yeah, suicidal thoughts. Pdoc thinks I'm fine though. I thought he was intelligent.
Tamara

No response-No responses

I also had a friend that ditched me. We dated for 2 years then he dumped me but both of us wanted to be friends, sometimes with benifets. The pyso girlfriend told him it was me or her so he chose her. I'm also almost 100% certian that she suffers from borderline perrsonality dissoeder. She breaks up with constelly hits him(not in the head)checkes his e mail and cell phine foe messages and isolates him from his male friends too. And he loves her. She's not a girlfriend but a jailer ans is prob abusive, all warning sings tha a woman would look out for with abusive men. He's bi-polar and I thin she'll deive him back into the hospatal and he hasn't been in one for 12 to 13 years. I was good to him I wasn't before because I didn't know I was ill, well his furnial(i hope not literlally)not mine.

I also have huge trust issues. My family also abandon me and did not protect me. When I was young through my young adulthood everyone I tried to trust hurt me emotionally and physically. I learned to keep to myself and protect me. But that is why I only have very few people in my life right now. I am in councleing and it took me six months even to trust her. I think the trust issue is huge when it comes to us, who tend to have had some kind of non-exsistant protection when we were young. Hang in there, I know what you are feeling.

I def have trust issues, as a matter of fact the first friend I've made in years has now made me wonder if I can trust her. She's unloaded all her drama on me and I don't think she's telling me all of her part in it all. I just want someone to freakin be honest. I'm also having a bad day cause my MIL felt like just because she was sitting there when I was telling my hubby of the drama that she knew it all and was questioning my friends intentions. That turned into rage. I no longer want that woman anywhere near me. But as for my friend, I will try to learn to trust again.

i've been dumped by 2 different men in a year. the first one really hurt,as he cheated on me and i have learned that he never cared for me during the 7 yrs we were a couple.

then,just 2 weeks ago, i was in the hospital and the second man, who had already proposed and i had the ring, abruptly dumped me b/c i'm "too overwhelming" he just wants to work, drink, and smoke pot...so not the greatest of environments for me.

So, now, my walls are up and the drawbridge is closed and locked. it'll take me awhile to trust again.

Wow :0 I fely I was the only one with this issue. I guss you never know untill you ask. I see I'm not alone and this seemes to be a BL issue. Thanks for sharing, *hugs all* now I don't feel all alone in this issue.

Same... I've got some serious trust issues. But I feel I have good reason not to trust ppl. They suck;well, most of them. And this even goes for my husband. And what's really stupid is that it's the little lies that really do me in. Like, tell me u'r gonna call then don't, tell me u'r gonna b home, & u'r not, etc... Don't get me wrong, the big lies hurt too, but all the little ones add up fast. So no, ur r not alone. (BIG HUG!!)

yes, my own father was emotionally neglectful.

my husband...what a mean SOB he was/is.

my grown children-have no freaking clue about what i deal with and don't seem to want to know.

i have major trust issues now. the castle walls are up and the drawbridge is shut tight.

my apologies for answering twice!