We are on year 5, going on 6, after disclosure of my daughter's sexual abuse by her father. We have all been doing pretty well, but "that" time is upon me. For the first time, she is actually interested in a boy. She has been friends with a few over the years, but this is the first time she is actually interested. In fact, she talked to me some time last year about the fact that all her girlfriends had boyfriends (or have had several actually) and wondered if this was due to her abuse and trust issues. I had told her that, yes, this may have something to do with her abuse issues, but as long as she felt okay with herself that there was no rush, but if she didn't feel okay about it, we could return to therapy (we were released late last year) to discuss it. So, I am happy for her and it's normal, but I worry so much and I'm just not ready!!!

And now, she has a job offer. It looks to be a good opportunity with good pay, but she will primarily be working directly under a man that is early 20's. I am having difficulty saying okay!!! I feel like I want to go for a while and monitor and make sure it's okay! Then, I think, it's only a year and half and she will be off to college, I have to let go a bit at some point in her life! It is so hard.

At this point, I have told her it sounds like a good opportunity and that I know I have to let go out in to the world at some point, but that I also have concerns and want reassurance that if anything seems off or if she is someway propositioned inappropriately or anything that she will get away and call me immediately. She has done so much work in therapy on good boundaries and being able to say no and speak out, but....she still seems too nice and so much a people pleaser and I am just so unsure myself and my ability to deal with all of it, or anything, or I just don't know!!