Parents of estranged adult children Community Group
One or more of our adult children walked out of our lives and never looked back.
the anticipation anxiety has me crazier than usual, but it appears i survived another one. so far. . . i haven't packed for the family event, but i am one of the most efficient packers i have ever known in my nomadic life. packing for an army batallion was the bestest jigsaw puzzle ever. packing for a family of five is, quite literally, child's play when packing for children.
the HDSA Hope Walk which originally motivated this family get-together has been cancelled, but the vote was to keep the family portion of the event online. my lines of communication with the rest of es's generation are even further estranged than they are with es. i don't know hubby's nephews well enough to have conflicts --or anything else-- with them. hubby doesn't, either. we don't have so much as a name for their 3 children we are hoping to introduce to the children tomorrow. just hoping. . . es is the first official estrangement on hubby's branch of the family tree, but ALL interbranch communication flowed through hubby's parents. since their deaths, there has been no communication, whatsoever. methinks estrangement comes in many flavors.
i can only guess what the weekend will hold, but methinks i am holding steady and as ready as i will ever be.
-
When i was in the ER February 16th 2025, i was being admitted to ICU where i was for 3 weeks, then had to relearn to walk for 3 weeks in another hospital rehab floor, the nurse told me something that made me feel for over 18 months now that i was finally *safe*. She told me that the guy who raped and beat me 21 years ago now almost 20 years at that time, was in prison as of a month before that...
-
You too know farewell that somber feeling when the sun went down on your wrath, and it left you in tears, and you mustered up the courage to become whole and complete again.And then again, the second time around, it came again, only this time a little stronger to withstand on your own, so pushed and pulled to rise above with loved ones/family.And so we did it again, three times a charm, but this...
I also think estrangement comes in many flavors and varieties. People get busy during their child rearing and work promotion years. Then we get older and see the value in knowing our relatives but by then so much time has gone by. I am glad you are seizing this opportunity!
i once had a dream where god rumbled to me through a classic cecile demille sunset, "parting the red sea was child's play compared to parting the muddy fields between estranged family members." our industrial room doesn't seem to carry much evidence that blood really is thicker than water.
the rest of the family showed for the event and the newest generation --only one of whom es has ever met in meetings so dissociated that the 10 year old he is today has no memory of his daddy's brother. the two girls (both 7) were especially impressed to learn they had cousins.
My parents estranged from their families and now I have one sister left (besides husband and adult kids). I have an adult cousin older than me who lives on my side of this huge big city and she can't get over the family conflict from our fathers plus she drinks and so no connection made. I so wanted to make a connection with her when I moved back here.
i come from a promiscuous family tree with more nuts than i can count, but still not much connection with any of them. i've wondered a time or twenty if it is a blessing to have enough siblings that i can be on speaking terms with 10% of them and still have a whole person to talk to.