Parenting Toddlers (1-3) Support Group
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Apparently, this is a controversial topic. I posed this topic on another forum and was deemed a child abuser of sorts.
I have seen many parents at Disney or some theme park or another, sometimes in stores or malls, who have their small toddler attached to a little line that lets the child wander a bit, but keeps them attached to the parent in question. I have recently seen ones that are fashioned to look like little furry monkeys or other such animals. No harm, right?
I never had to worry about getting one before, because my older duaghter wasn't a complete nutter like my little one. She stayed either in the shopping cart or close by my side or in a stroller with no qualms whatsoever.
Today, I was doing a fair bit of grocery shopping and Ellorie was already in the foulest of foul moods because she has a bottom molar that is causing her much strife. Usually she happily sits in the cart, content with grabbing various things and throwing them in the cart so when I go to pay, I become keenly confused.
Not today.
Today she shouted, cried, and tried to jump out of the cart a number of times, drawing side glances from other patrons buying their bananas and such.
Jaquelin couldn't cheer her.
Random stuffed animals couldn't cheer her (though they did receive an unfair amount of tears and snot on their poor artificial fur).
The nice lady who brought over a Ralph's balloon couldn't cheer her.
Finally, after enduring probably the most harrowing grocery trip of my life, I went to pay.
Ellorie nearly gave herself a concussion as she sought after the machine where one swipes their various forms of payment. I gave in and took her out of the cart, expecting her to be semi-happy in my arms as I struggled to get my stupid debit card through the slot and decide on paper or plastic.
Not so much.
In the flash of a second, she is out of my arms, has taken one shoe off (but still has it in her hand) and with a pretty, red balloon clipped to her blouse, and is sprinting to get out of the door. I left my wallet and groceries and a confused cashier (Jaquelin has been no help, as she went off to look at the toy section. Not that she could keep Ellorie from chaos. No one keeps Ellorie from chaos) at the counter as I chased her down, and went to finish my embarrassing transaction.
Holding a screaming toddler in one arm, pushing the very full cart with another, I could have used one of these contraptions. The lead. The leash. The restraint, as it were.
As said, apparently, some parents are against this type of thing because they think it is abusive and violates a child's rights. I am almost quoting a response I got from someone on Babycenter.
Ruddy mental.
So...anybody have one of these things? Is it effective?
I have seen many parents at Disney or some theme park or another, sometimes in stores or malls, who have their small toddler attached to a little line that lets the child wander a bit, but keeps them attached to the parent in question. I have recently seen ones that are fashioned to look like little furry monkeys or other such animals. No harm, right?
I never had to worry about getting one before, because my older duaghter wasn't a complete nutter like my little one. She stayed either in the shopping cart or close by my side or in a stroller with no qualms whatsoever.
Today, I was doing a fair bit of grocery shopping and Ellorie was already in the foulest of foul moods because she has a bottom molar that is causing her much strife. Usually she happily sits in the cart, content with grabbing various things and throwing them in the cart so when I go to pay, I become keenly confused.
Not today.
Today she shouted, cried, and tried to jump out of the cart a number of times, drawing side glances from other patrons buying their bananas and such.
Jaquelin couldn't cheer her.
Random stuffed animals couldn't cheer her (though they did receive an unfair amount of tears and snot on their poor artificial fur).
The nice lady who brought over a Ralph's balloon couldn't cheer her.
Finally, after enduring probably the most harrowing grocery trip of my life, I went to pay.
Ellorie nearly gave herself a concussion as she sought after the machine where one swipes their various forms of payment. I gave in and took her out of the cart, expecting her to be semi-happy in my arms as I struggled to get my stupid debit card through the slot and decide on paper or plastic.
Not so much.
In the flash of a second, she is out of my arms, has taken one shoe off (but still has it in her hand) and with a pretty, red balloon clipped to her blouse, and is sprinting to get out of the door. I left my wallet and groceries and a confused cashier (Jaquelin has been no help, as she went off to look at the toy section. Not that she could keep Ellorie from chaos. No one keeps Ellorie from chaos) at the counter as I chased her down, and went to finish my embarrassing transaction.
Holding a screaming toddler in one arm, pushing the very full cart with another, I could have used one of these contraptions. The lead. The leash. The restraint, as it were.
As said, apparently, some parents are against this type of thing because they think it is abusive and violates a child's rights. I am almost quoting a response I got from someone on Babycenter.
Ruddy mental.
So...anybody have one of these things? Is it effective?
I see NO PROBLEM at all in using one. Try going to the store with 3 little doofusses in tow! Sophie likes to run, and in the process mow down everything and anyone in her way. I finally got her a monkey (kinda funny that she's only 2 and already has a monkey on her back) and she loves it! She always wants to wear it, she even talks to the dang thing.
I've never got any bad looks or rude comments, but I get the crazy people that want to come over and coo over how cute Sophie is, blah blah.......that's the only thing that is a drawback to the leashes.
Oh, and BTW, your story reminds me of our last trip to Target. I say bring the leash on...if she decided to take off, all you need to do is YANK LOL
She never wore it again! :-)))
I am now raising her daughter and I tell you some days I do think about placing one on her. I haven't seen the new types that you mention but they sound quite cute.
Its your choice and from my perspective whatever makes a calmer mum makes a better and more fun mum (barring illegal drugs and alcohol of course *grin*)
People are just too judgemental, ignore them and do what's right for you and your bubbies.
DD
Anyhow, I was told by a coworker several years ago that her sister needed a leash since she would just take off and it was a safety issue. The leashes have changed and aren't so (crap I had a BIG word to use and I cant think of it now) Mommy Dearest like anymore.
Parents who don't have problems with their kids running off (yeah, they exist, but I've never seen one) may give dirty looks, but I think secretly, they'd like to be able to give a good yank every now and then ha ha ha
I had a wrist thing with my son that I used maybe twice.. but he never ran off.
Now I have 3 kids.. and my toddler is a runner. We were just talking about these leashes the other day. I don't think I would use it all the time, but maybe at the grocery store or somewhere she might run. i can't leave my infant in the cart to chase my other kid.
I have seen the kids that are allowed to run loose... and I think they either need more discipline, or they need one of these leashes.
I am thinking of getting the backpack leash. It is a stuffed animal that is worn like a backpack.. and the leash is on the animal part.
And.. think of the opposite... with all the kidnapping and stuff... i would feel safer to have all the kids in check than to play it by ear. What if you leave the infant in the cart to chase the toddler... and then you turn around and the cart is gone!
To the complainers....
Give me all the nasty looks you want... but until I see you handle what i am handling... don't say a word.
if you don't vote, you have no opinion in the election!
Yes.. there are people who overdo it....
i would rather keep my kid safe than to have to put them on a milk carton and search for them.
isn't that how we are gettign the brats.. the ones who sue their parents?
last time I checked... the parents are responsible for teaching discipline and raising the child... and protecting the child...
It is not the child to be born with independence.. they have to learn how to be independent over the years... and be taught by the parents.
We, the parents, are responsible for our children.
It is our duty to keep them safe and teach them boundaries.
Like Alfei said....
we put them in 5 point car seats... we use baby gates... we use cribs....
why?... because we care
My son loves his monkey to take "piggy back rides" on his back-I just made a big game out of it and I am assured that he is safe all in the same.
My mother bought one for my Ellora when she was 1. It's a teddybear backpack with a leash on it. Ellora is now over 2 and a half and I've never used it on her. However, it's always in the back of my mind. Ellora is "spirited" as I believe they call it these days. I have horrible nightmares about her dashing out in front of a car or worse! I've been trying to teach her to hold our hands when we are by a road or of course crossing a street...or even at the mall. I think my concern about using it was not that it was a bad thing, but that it would keep her from learning how to stay close to us...like maybe the leash would be a hinderance to her developmentally.
Anyone understand what I'm saying?
I seriously don't know what I would have done in your case with your daughter - I cringe when I think about it. I think it could be worth trying, but consider she may have a meltdown and instead of holding her screaming and crying, you are holding on to the leash while she's throwing a tantrum on the floor. Either way, I think we're screwed when it comes to shopping and tantrums! Darnit! Not sure if this helps, but I definitely empathize...shame on people for saying bad things to you! Closed minded moms! Good luck!
We do it with other things.
I made one for my oldest, ADHD & now 30+, as they were no longer available in stores. It saved DD1's life on more than 1 occasion.
DD2 never seemed to need one.
I have purchased several for my son, 4 soon & Autistic. He wore them away from home as soon as he could stand. (He loves them; they mean bye-bye.) He's usually on the wrist strap now & I made a covered elastic extension that can let him go an additional 6 feet (or not, depending on how I hold it).
Some kids are fine w/o them, some need them.
A young man at Walmart told me that he didn't believe in them until he started working there. There is at least one "Code Adam" (missing child) daily. He wishes more parents would use them & he plans on doing it when he's a Dad.
Retort:
You keep the dog on a leash because you love it & don't want it lost, stolen or hit by a car. Which one does not apply to my son?
Against their human rights? WTF - Man, I hate hearing about human rights, it just pushes my buttons! Yeah, it's every toddlers right to end up lost or under a car.
The time I really wished I had one was flying international and arriving back in NZ after something like 16 hours on a plane. I was exhausted and grumpy, so was DH. DD had slept most of the time (Thank God!) so was full of beans. We were standing in the passport queue and DD kept trying to take off running. The only thing that was stopping her was a piece of yellow tape that she didn't even have to duck to get under - Note to all the non-parents who were standing in queue with us: 16 MONTH OLDS DON'T UNDERSTAND ABOUT PIECES OF YELLOW TAPE!
I kept grabbing her hand and she would do her patented Clare-bear drama queen act - Fall over and let out a scream! I was looked at like a child abuser. All in all it would have been more subtle and convenient and less distressing to all if DD had been on a leash.
And it doesn't hurt them - It just keeps them safe.