Parenting Toddlers (1-3) Support Group
This community is focused on the joys, challenges and concerns faced by parents of toddlers (1 to 3 year olds). The major areas of child development include: physical development, perception and sensory development, communication and language development, cognitive development, emotional development and social development. Join to share your stories and get advice.
Apparently, this is a controversial topic. I posed this topic on another forum and was deemed a child abuser of sorts.
I have seen many parents at Disney or some theme park or another, sometimes in stores or malls, who have their small toddler attached to a little line that lets the child wander a bit, but keeps them attached to the parent in question. I have recently seen ones that are fashioned to look like little furry monkeys or other such animals. No harm, right?
I never had to worry about getting one before, because my older duaghter wasn't a complete nutter like my little one. She stayed either in the shopping cart or close by my side or in a stroller with no qualms whatsoever.
Today, I was doing a fair bit of grocery shopping and Ellorie was already in the foulest of foul moods because she has a bottom molar that is causing her much strife. Usually she happily sits in the cart, content with grabbing various things and throwing them in the cart so when I go to pay, I become keenly confused.
Not today.
Today she shouted, cried, and tried to jump out of the cart a number of times, drawing side glances from other patrons buying their bananas and such.
Jaquelin couldn't cheer her.
Random stuffed animals couldn't cheer her (though they did receive an unfair amount of tears and snot on their poor artificial fur).
The nice lady who brought over a Ralph's balloon couldn't cheer her.
Finally, after enduring probably the most harrowing grocery trip of my life, I went to pay.
Ellorie nearly gave herself a concussion as she sought after the machine where one swipes their various forms of payment. I gave in and took her out of the cart, expecting her to be semi-happy in my arms as I struggled to get my stupid debit card through the slot and decide on paper or plastic.
Not so much.
In the flash of a second, she is out of my arms, has taken one shoe off (but still has it in her hand) and with a pretty, red balloon clipped to her blouse, and is sprinting to get out of the door. I left my wallet and groceries and a confused cashier (Jaquelin has been no help, as she went off to look at the toy section. Not that she could keep Ellorie from chaos. No one keeps Ellorie from chaos) at the counter as I chased her down, and went to finish my embarrassing transaction.
Holding a screaming toddler in one arm, pushing the very full cart with another, I could have used one of these contraptions. The lead. The leash. The restraint, as it were.
As said, apparently, some parents are against this type of thing because they think it is abusive and violates a child's rights. I am almost quoting a response I got from someone on Babycenter.
Ruddy mental.
So...anybody have one of these things? Is it effective?
I have seen many parents at Disney or some theme park or another, sometimes in stores or malls, who have their small toddler attached to a little line that lets the child wander a bit, but keeps them attached to the parent in question. I have recently seen ones that are fashioned to look like little furry monkeys or other such animals. No harm, right?
I never had to worry about getting one before, because my older duaghter wasn't a complete nutter like my little one. She stayed either in the shopping cart or close by my side or in a stroller with no qualms whatsoever.
Today, I was doing a fair bit of grocery shopping and Ellorie was already in the foulest of foul moods because she has a bottom molar that is causing her much strife. Usually she happily sits in the cart, content with grabbing various things and throwing them in the cart so when I go to pay, I become keenly confused.
Not today.
Today she shouted, cried, and tried to jump out of the cart a number of times, drawing side glances from other patrons buying their bananas and such.
Jaquelin couldn't cheer her.
Random stuffed animals couldn't cheer her (though they did receive an unfair amount of tears and snot on their poor artificial fur).
The nice lady who brought over a Ralph's balloon couldn't cheer her.
Finally, after enduring probably the most harrowing grocery trip of my life, I went to pay.
Ellorie nearly gave herself a concussion as she sought after the machine where one swipes their various forms of payment. I gave in and took her out of the cart, expecting her to be semi-happy in my arms as I struggled to get my stupid debit card through the slot and decide on paper or plastic.
Not so much.
In the flash of a second, she is out of my arms, has taken one shoe off (but still has it in her hand) and with a pretty, red balloon clipped to her blouse, and is sprinting to get out of the door. I left my wallet and groceries and a confused cashier (Jaquelin has been no help, as she went off to look at the toy section. Not that she could keep Ellorie from chaos. No one keeps Ellorie from chaos) at the counter as I chased her down, and went to finish my embarrassing transaction.
Holding a screaming toddler in one arm, pushing the very full cart with another, I could have used one of these contraptions. The lead. The leash. The restraint, as it were.
As said, apparently, some parents are against this type of thing because they think it is abusive and violates a child's rights. I am almost quoting a response I got from someone on Babycenter.
Ruddy mental.
So...anybody have one of these things? Is it effective?
Or they may have been Special Needs.
As embarrassing as it may be for my husband, I can easily see my son, ASD, on a tether at 7. (People would probably be less judgmental if he was tethered to a Service Dog, instead of Mom, but who has $15,000?)
These were the responses I would expect from this subject. When I hear parents speaking against it because of the child's rights, I have to retort that a child has the right to be safe, and I, as a parent, have the responsibility to provide that right, as children haven't the knowledge yet to provide this right for themselves. Therefore a harness (for my little one) is preserving her rights.
People! Hmph...
I have no qualms about doing what i feel is necessary, and my two girls prove the point that often becomes a mantra: "Every child is different".
While my older one didn't need one, my little one does. She's fast, curious, tyrannical, and a wrecking-ball. A recipe for disaster, as they say.
And I got me one today.
It's actually quite adorable--I think it may be the same one that you have, Maggie--it's a little monkey backpack and it clasps in the front. The tail then unfurls to be what the parent holds.
I fully expect tantrums whether she has it on or off, but at least in moments of paying a cashier, I am not trying to hold an angry and wriggling baby in my arms.
I imagine it won't be an everyday used item, as she will indeed sit in the cart if she's in a decent mood, as well as a stroller, but on those days where nothing but a free-run will make her happy in a store, than I'm whipping it out. Not to mention for trips to the zoo, and other such crowded places. (I actually hate the zoo. Let's talk about rights of the innocent, shall we? I bail on the zoo and am okay with the wild animal parks. I don't like circuses either. or is it circii?)
I'd rather look like a mean mom with my child on a harness than a mom that can't find her child.
I plan to try this new contraption out in a test-run at the mall. I'll keep a tally of how many dirty looks I get :)
Incidentally, there were three different styles of this 'backpack" / harness. the monkey, a doggie, and a bear.
All very cute.
~Debbie
I was against them too for a while... i thought they were silly (not a violation of rights)
And.. now that my daughter is a toddler and a wild one... I have decided that it may be a great idea for her. My first was pretty much latched on to me, so he didn't need it. This child... she likes to run and be independent. For her safety, I will have to suck up all the silly feelings and get her something to help keep her near me.
My step mom asked me about leashes last week.. and we both kinda rolled our eyes... even hubby was laughing about them.
But... the more we think about it... we need one.
I just wish that the self-righteous busybodies who make snide remarks & threaten me with DFC would leave me alone.
I also wish the woman with 3 kids who never noticed that her LO turned left when she went right (I brought him back 4X, 4 rows each time) would get one instead of criticizing me for using one.
I don't have one, but there are also a lot of stores I won't go into with DS in tow unless DH is with me. We took him into a liquor store once. We held him the entire time (I didn't want to see an aisle full of alcohol and broken glass! LOL!) DH left with him while I was paying. We he got outside he put DS down. The sales girl commented that DS's legs were moving as soon as the touched the ground.
I knew I had an active inquisitive child when other parents started commenting on it.
Oh and speaking of people that do need a harness or something. We were at our city fireworks show for the fourth. It's dark and there are a lot of people around and this toddler is wandering around by himself while the at least 5 adults he was with were lounging in the bed of their truck. One mom finally took the kid back b/c he was slapping her baby.
I don't have one, but there are also a lot of stores I won't go into with DS in tow unless DH is with me. We took him into a liquor store once. We held him the entire time (I didn't want to see an aisle full of alcohol and broken glass! LOL!) DH left with him while I was paying. We he got outside he put DS down. The sales girl commented that DS's legs were moving as soon as the touched the ground.
I knew I had an active inquisitive child when other parents started commenting on it.
Oh and speaking of people that do need a harness or something. We were at our city fireworks show for the fourth. It's dark and there are a lot of people around and this toddler who was probably not even 2 was wandering around by himself while the at least 5 adults he was with were lounging in the bed of their truck. One mom finally took the kid back b/c he was slapping her baby. Oh I forgot to mention that this was in a parking lot, not that anyone was driving fast, but this kid was little and like I said it was dark....
I say SCREW WHAT OTHER PEOPLE THINK... I tell them to walk a mile in my shoes and THEN try shopping w/ a rambunctious toddler!