Hi all! I'm a registered nurse who has been suffering from many different odd symptoms for the last 3 and a half years. It all started in October 2012 when I fell on a cross trainer and my legs weren't strong enough to pull myself up. From then on I started getting new symptoms regularly. These include: not being able to wear heels because my legs would give way, not being able to smile in photographs as my mouth didn't work properly, regular double vision, problems keeping my eyes open, general fatigue and the main one is the inability to do any exercise as my legs and arms would give way (running, cycling, aerobics, yoga etc). I also struggle to get dressed/undressed, shower, style my hair etc. So in March/April 2013 I started the ball rolling and visited my GP who did various blood tests and told me I could "have anything from MS to Motor Neurones". As you can all imagine this induced great worry and anxiety in me and I started to suffer with panic attacks and severe anxiety. As a student nurse at the time, nursing people with these disorders, I was an absolute mess. I was referred to a Neurologist (after the GP forgot to dictate the letter so I was delayed by a month!!!) and went to see him in July 2013. He gave me the all clear. Didn't even offer me a scan as my symptoms weren't in keeping with MS. I was reassured, he said I could contact him whenever I wanted to if I wanted to see him again or request an MRI, he also advised me to have cognitive behaviour therapy for "health anxiety". I trusted his professional opinion and off I went. As my anxiety greatly increased, so did my symptoms. But they didn't ever completely disappear. In November 2013 I started a new relationship and his mum had MS (I worried this would be a trigger for the symptoms starting again but it didn't). I still had the same symptoms all the time, struggled to write my 3rd year nursing dissertation in May 2014 due to my persistent double vision, had a deadline extension as extenuating circumstances, and went back to the opticians (again). They gave my glasses with prisms in them, told me I also needed prescription sunglasses and sent me on my way. Oddly enough, my double vision persisted and I was referred to the eye hospital. They have been following me up every 3 months since and haven't been able to find a reason for my double vision (remember this point for later in my post!) So in February 2015 I was away for valentines day (no anxiety at this point) and had to walk up a lot of stairs to a car park. Half way up my legs started to fail, I couldn't carry on. Had to drag myself up with the hand rail. Couldn't walk to the car and then when I finally got to the car I couldn't lift my leg high enough and I fell over. Hello more horrendous symptoms!! I was straight back to the GP on Monday morning. Asked to be referred back to the Neurologist. He forgot to dictate the letter, AGAIN! By this point I was struggling to eat, smile, laugh, to be honest I was a mess. Had my MRI in April 2015 and saw the Neurologist the day after for the results. Clear MRI, nothing wrong with me, I need psychological treatment. I am happy once again, trust his opinion and away I go. Oddly enough, symptoms don't go. I hold my hands up and visit my GP and ask for help for my anxiety as it must be what is causing my symptoms. The GP reaches behind, onto her shelf, and passes me an "anxiety and depression service" leaflet and advises me to refer myself. So I did, I had my first appointment and it was decided I had health anxiety and I needed to work on getting out there and doing exercise. August 2015, my birthday weekend, had an amazing line up of social events and my legs and mouth ruined it for me. Couldn't smile in any photos, they are quite frankly terrifying to look at. So back to my CBT counsellor and she says she doesn't really know how to help me. Excellent! So I'm still being followed up my the eye hospital, they're still unsure what is causing my double vision, I have loads of tests and I see the consultant. "There is nothing wrong with your eyes, you need treatment for your anxiety" By this time I am just utterly depressed wondering why the hell I can't just pull myself together. 3 months later, eye hospital appointment, not sure what's wrong with my eyes. See me again in 3 months. March 2016 I go to New York and I'm exhausted from all the walking, travelling etc and go to the Natural History Museum and I'm looking up at a big screen with 4D glasses on. My eyelids won't open, I cannot see properly. Closed my eyes throughout the show. Great now it's ruining my holiday of a life time. Go outside the theatre and tell my other half, he laughs and says I look stoned (he's not a bad guy, quite the opposite infact, but anyone would find the photo of my droopy eyes quite an interesting one!) So naturally this eyelid problem causes anxiety for the rest of the holiday and I result to wearing sunglasses the whole time as it seemed to help. Did I go and see anyone about this? No, because I'm just anxious remember! Next time I'm seen at the eye hospital I mention it and FINALLY she throws a condition at me. I didn't catch the name of the condition (luckily, as Dr Google can be a cruel mistress) and she asks if I've had the blood test for it. "No? What blood test??" I reply very puzzled. "You've seen a neurologist twice and you haven't had the blood test for *insert condition here*???" she retorts. "Nope, no blood test, just advised to sort my head out". So she stops the appointment there and then and says she's getting me in to the see the Neuro-ophthalmologist in a month's time and sends me on my way. I go away and try not to think about it for the next month but assume I'm going to get diagnosed with something at my next appointment. 16th June arrives. I'm seen by the people I'm usually seen by (think they're optometrists?) and he does the tests they normally do, and decides that I need prism glasses. Oh did I chuckle inside, as you know from way up in this post, that was their course of action 2 years ago and then advised me to stop wearing them! So I just politely nodded and went to the waiting room to see the main neuro people. I'm called in, and she asks me if I've had the blood test for Myasthenia Gravis, I again said no and she looked shocked. She told me it sounds likely that I've got this condition and says that the MRI I had doesn't diagnose muscle problems and goes to consult another doctor. I'm left on my own in a room for 25 minutes thinking my life was about to change (also googling the England Euro football score) and feeling utterly deflated that nobody has suggested this condition before but instead made my convinced that I've been crazy and lazy for the last 3 and a half years. She comes back, tells me that the blood test for MG can come back negative even if I've got it and that they're going to treat me for it either way. She also mentions surgery to remove a gland in the chest. I ask her what the chances are that I have none of this and it IS just anxiety and her reply was "I'm not comfortable just assuming that this is anxiety anymore". The relief I felt was unreal. Finally someone was listening to me. I'm not completely crazy. I went and had the blood test, I have the appointment for the results on the 21st July and I have since googled the condition and my god, does it sounds like the missing jigsaw puzzle I have been looking for for the last 3 and a half years. Despite all of this, I graduated as a nurse and I have been working full time as a nurse since September 2014. I am utterly exhausted every single day and I can't socialise like I used to unless I am in the company of people I trust who know my story. I feel like a diagnosis of Myasthenia Gravis will set me free but naturally worried about what the future (and medication side affects) will bring. But bring it on, I am ready!