Ok, I have a lot to say, so I will make quick points to make reading easier.

I am a 41 year old mom. 2 girls, ages 11 and 4. Married.

I can walk. I rarely use a cane. I deal with some fatigue. Mostly the tingling, MS hugs, headaches, burning sensations, odd and ends.

My worst thing is muscle spasms. These are really putting me out for the count and they are getting worse and worse. Making doing things hard. I cannot drive long distances. I can do things but I pay and I get scared when things start not working.

Typing this is excruciating. More pain.

But, I get by.

My house. Right now:

My living room is clean except an empty clothes basket my 4 year old was playing with. Nothing else in it.

Kitchen, clean except the dishwasher needs empty and the floor has some crumbs the kids dropped.

Hallway, all clear.

Bedrooms... meh. My 4 year old has toys and clothes drug out, I need to clean up.

11 year old - clean.

My bedroom - 2 baskets of clean clothes to put away. A few odd and ends. I'd say about 7 things to pick up.

Bathrooms. All clean. All 3 of them.

Laundry room. Organized but I have 4 loads of dirty laundry.

Now, this week. I cooked 4 dinners. Not hot dogs and french fries, but 4 dinners. Well rounded, healthy meals. I cleaned. Went to the dr. Got my kids from school every day. Went grocery shopping. Picked up a neighbors kids and took her home each day who's mom works. Also babysat 2 days. Also helped my daughter with homework every night among all the things a mom does.

Ok. We recently moved in to a new home. My inlaws bought this house and we are paying them back. They came down today to work on the yard. They do that when my husband is not here because they don't want to "bother him".

Well, today was a BAD day. As in, I could barely walk. I went outside to talk a minute and thought I would collapse. I got scared. I went back inside.

My mother in law hates when people are sick. So I try to hide it. She hates anyone getting attention besides her.

Well. My MIL told my husband today that I I was not keeping house clean enough. That the kitchen floor had crumbs on it. Then she said I need to start working and make money.

What?

I can barely get through the day as it is. I am in the middle of a relapse, and she knows this... and she brings this up NOW!!

My husband told her that would not be possible. Then she said...

ARE YOU READY FOR IT?

"Maybe she should be put in a nursing home?"

....... I really have no idea how to react to that.

I mean obviously I don't need to be in one. Look at what all I can do, not only for myself but others. I am caring for them... not them for me.

It's as if she was saying, "She is of no use to our family. She does not provide money. She does not clean. she is useless to us, to you (my husband) and to the girls, lets just stick her in a home and forget about her. She serves no purpose anymore."

I think in my 41 years of life that that is the cruelest thing anyone has ever said.