I don't know if that is true or not, but it seems like the only logical way to explain it because you can't really force anything. I have a small amount of friends I spend time with as much as possible, but I do wish I had a romantic companion. So in that regard I feel very lonely. It's hard to find someone.

well your first priority should be finding a job....that just makes sense...the rest the chips will fall where they may...I enjoy meetup.com for singles groups because they provide the events to meetup with others that I may never have met without meetup.com

Sometimes it never happens and we have to find ways to deal with that and still try to be happy. A lifetime's work. Sorry to hear your father is sick and you are out of work. I hope things get better soon.

Hi there. It seems like once you stop looking, someone falls into your lap (figuratively lol). It's kind of a weird phenomenon.

Funny you put this I was wanting to ask the same thing. I don't want to find someone out of desperation but am pretty lonely and keep wondering what it would be like to be with someone. I have been working on my problems after divorce for a couple of years now and thinking if I did get into a relationship I'm pretty sure by now I would stay away from abusers but do I want to take the chance? Then there is the other part of what you mentioned eventually the write person will come along this is why I havnt signed up for dating sites. Is there a right one out there? Makes you wonder dosn't it. Certainly might help with the lonelyness but I don't know.

Thinking more on this topic what about friendships mabee its better to make long lasting friendships and then eventually one of those friendships is bound to become a positive realtionship hopefully.

Too many comments sorry was just thinking sorry to hear about your father and the loss of work.

"what about friendships mabee its better to make long lasting friendships and then eventually one of those friendships is bound to become a positive realtionship hopefully."

Mammoth, yes, this is the best way to go in my opinion!

Sorry to hear about your father...I sort of understand what you are going through because my father is sick also.. as for the loneliness, that's just something that we all have to work on..just keep working on yourself...the rest will fall into place eventually..at least that's what I'm hoping for myself.

Sorry about your father and your job situation. You have enough on your plate. I can relate - I also would like companionship - and dating sites seem to be cramped with more people who are looking for sex. That's not what I value in a mate - sex is easy to find. I want an activity buddy - someone to share nature and life with. Like another poster said - It doesn't always happen at our pace - I know many people that have opted to give up on looking and are instead living very happy active lives by staying busy with other things and joining groups of people who have common interest - I did try meetup a while back and wasn't too successful but I am going to give it another try and just select a different category - for example -hiking groups vs happy hour type of groups. Seems like many meetup groups are also loaded with folks looking to meet mates and the energy of the females can be kind of interesting because there are way more females than males in some of these groups. So I am going to join but with the goal of making friends - not finding a mate.

Good luck to you.

Derek, sorry about your father and your job. Thats a lot to take on and I can imagine makes you wish you had someone even more.

I think a lot of us feel the same way. I'd love to have a partner, but my options are to either learn to enjoy being single or totally lower my standards and date some creep from online.

I am hoping to let things fall into place. I'll continue to go out with friends, but am going to try and not worry about it. It will happen when its suppose to.