Lesbian Relationship Challenges Support Group
This community is for those who are in a gay marriage, and the unique challenges that may be had in a same-sex relationship. Find support and talk to others in a same-sex marriage, and get advice from the experiences of other members.
I'm worried about how I'm acting in my relationship.
Basically...I have terrible insecurity. I have severe depression and anxiety, both of which have hugely affected me very recently. I seem to have lost all self-worth, and lost my true self. I was happy in the summer time - content with who I was and everything else - I don't know how things have changed so dramatically.
I'm getting paranoid. For example...my girlfriend said she was too tired to travel down to see me (we live about 60 miles apart and neither of us drive) when we had planned. I took this very personally and got extremely upset. I cried down the phone to her and told her that seeing her is all I look forward to and I was upset with her for cancelling on me. My mind was saying 'she musn't love you' 'she doesn't care' etc.
She gets very frustrated with me because I can't seem to accept the fact she loves me. I ask her why she does. Because I can't see anything likable in myself, I can barely comprehend why anyone would want to spend time with me, let alone love me.
She treats me well...she spends what little money she has to come and see me and buy me a little gift every now and then. We have trouble understanding each other at times. She is autistic and as a result struggles to say certain things and generally be in social situations and she can't understand why I'm so insecure and why I try to find a hidden meaning in everything.
I can't live like this...I want to stop. I just want to be happy and enjoy my relationship, instead of constantly making things up in my head and blowing things out of proportion. Any thoughts? :( I don't want to lose her.
Basically...I have terrible insecurity. I have severe depression and anxiety, both of which have hugely affected me very recently. I seem to have lost all self-worth, and lost my true self. I was happy in the summer time - content with who I was and everything else - I don't know how things have changed so dramatically.
I'm getting paranoid. For example...my girlfriend said she was too tired to travel down to see me (we live about 60 miles apart and neither of us drive) when we had planned. I took this very personally and got extremely upset. I cried down the phone to her and told her that seeing her is all I look forward to and I was upset with her for cancelling on me. My mind was saying 'she musn't love you' 'she doesn't care' etc.
She gets very frustrated with me because I can't seem to accept the fact she loves me. I ask her why she does. Because I can't see anything likable in myself, I can barely comprehend why anyone would want to spend time with me, let alone love me.
She treats me well...she spends what little money she has to come and see me and buy me a little gift every now and then. We have trouble understanding each other at times. She is autistic and as a result struggles to say certain things and generally be in social situations and she can't understand why I'm so insecure and why I try to find a hidden meaning in everything.
I can't live like this...I want to stop. I just want to be happy and enjoy my relationship, instead of constantly making things up in my head and blowing things out of proportion. Any thoughts? :( I don't want to lose her.
The reason I ask is because when we have a lot of people and things we love in our lives, we feel less anxious, depressed, needy. But when we hang all of our happiness on one person it is a heavy load for them and makes us miserable too.
If you enjoy your job and/or hobbies, other friends and activities - and your gf is one piece of that happy puzzle, it's better for you and her.
What sort of things would make life worth living? What would make life fun? How can you do more of that?