I'm actually a fan of marriage. I don't see why we can't call it that, because that's what it is, by definition. Just because it doesn't involve a man and a woman doesn't mean it isn't the same thing. Part of changing the way everyone else thinks is changing the way we think first.

Okay...sort of. ;)

I want to get married, but my girl won't. She says if it's not "real" and properly recognized it's a farce. I guess I can see her point. We exchanged rings years ago, but just did it ourselves, no ceremony or guests. We just verbalized our commitment to each other.

My partner and I had a committment ceremony in our church in 05. We did the domestic partner thing that same year in aug. On 22-08 we are going to make it as legal as can be here in NJ we are going to do Civil Union. We are soulmates she is my BELOVED!

I think that marriage is a great word for it. Why is it that you think it sounds too heterosexual?

I'm married, and I wouldn't have it any other way. I don't give a flying fig if this country doesn't recognize it yet; my wife and I do, and that's what matters. We're just like any other couple, just without the drama. We love fiercely, we are inseparable, and we have spats like anyone else. We share money, food, nail polish and worries. There is no reason in my eyes why we shouldn't be seen as one, not separate. She's even going to change her last name to mine, for good measure! I say go for it, who cares if it's "hetero" or any other label it could be given? Love is love, just go with it :)

My wife and I of 7 1/2 years had a holy union. We had a Christian minister and it was the best wedding EVER!! Sadly, the marriage was not. Even though marriage between two women is not legal, you can get an attorney and enjoy many of the advantages that the hets do. BTW, we were wife and wife. Neither was considered the husband, which many people just assume is the case.

ummm, OK...sort a

Mahadra, I love that she is taking your name! That is so sweet! We decided that if/when we get married (I am still trying to convince her) we would combine out last names into a merged, new last name. Our pets already have our new name, but sadly we don't yet.

im not a fan of marriage. i would problys do a shane a do a runner. eek

Marriage existed long before it was codified by church and state. It is an agreement to keep faith with, love, and protect each other as well as producing a family.

I grew up in a foster home - two of them, in fact, but don't try to tell me that I have no family because I have no blood relatives. I still love Mama Moffatt and I'd still be welcome under her roof if I ever had to go back there. She'd be welcome under mine.

Family is not about consanguinity - it's about stability and caring. It's about the people who make up that family, not about licensing and religious rituals.

US laws recognize a philandering husband and a faithless wife who ignore their kids as a family. US laws will try to hold together parents and children who abuse each other. US laws do not recognize two faithful, loving parents of beloved child if those parents are of the same gender. Well, who the heck asked the US to recognize anything?

I hope to one day find a woman who will love me and want me and when that happens I'll do my damnedest to make her happy. When that happens, we will be married in our hearts - which is the only place that matters.

- Randa

Randa, with an attitude like that, you will find someone to cherish you above all else very soon, I think. What a beautiful view you have of family and love. This world (especially this group) is lucky to have you!

A few months after we got together my partner and I had a marriage ceremony with our minister and a few friends in our church.

We had dahlias on the alter (her favorite flower). I found a dress I liked (dark red with flowers) and I made a dress and jacket for her to wear.

Unfortunately we had to make sure we did this by sneaking into the church because our minister could have been fired for doing it.

Beautiful Randa. Thank you and Kgirl...wow!

I guess we have to re-define what we think marriage is. It has always been heterosexual but maybe it is time for a different perception and definition. A peice of paper and ceremony doesn't, "do the work," that will bring or keeps souls together.