Jealousy Support Group
Jealousy typically refers to the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that occur when a person believes a valued relationship is being threatened by a rival. This rival may or may not know that he or she is perceived as a threat. If you or a loved one may have an issue with jealousy, this community is a good place to start exploring the issue and get support. We're here for...
I am trying to use the 12 step program for jealousy and it seems to be helpful.
http://www.12stepworkbook.org/workbooks/jealousy
At a question about why I have not given up this habit (considering it to be an addiction) if it is causing me so much harm, I realized I have some beliefs about losing love if I don't hold onto it. It might mean eotional dependency issues. I am not sure or clear about this one.
So if someone were to ask you, why do you continue to act jealous or feed this feeling when it is causing so much harm and hurt to your lives and relationships, what would your answer be?
http://www.12stepworkbook.org/workbooks/jealousy
At a question about why I have not given up this habit (considering it to be an addiction) if it is causing me so much harm, I realized I have some beliefs about losing love if I don't hold onto it. It might mean eotional dependency issues. I am not sure or clear about this one.
So if someone were to ask you, why do you continue to act jealous or feed this feeling when it is causing so much harm and hurt to your lives and relationships, what would your answer be?
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89FToday it is again another hot day but cooler then yesterday. Since this is August it is to be expected in my neck of the woods. All the grass is yellow and flowers are starting to go to seed. I need to water my garden but this time of the year I'm so over it, which is weird because all my plants have their fruit or veggies.Sandra, this time of year reminds me of your Dad and his toms. We'd...
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Well...... I don't know if i can explain it right, but its to do with my CORE beliefs.
A baby, a child, a teen, a son , a daughter has needs from his or her parents. Hopefully the needs are met, the child learns from this that they are important, valued, worthwhile....they become empowered with this knowledge and grow in self esteem.
Unfortunately for me and i expect others on here, this didn't happen, and so WE learned that we are not important, not valued and not worthwhile. We were not empowered and we have no self esteem.
Because we were children and didn't know any better or have the skills to deal with this, we came up with thoughts that we are useless and not lovable, ugly, stupid, we should die, we deserve shit cos we are shit, WE blamed ourself for everything!
I internalised it all, it all became very destructive, a destructive habit and behaviour pattern.
It is very hard to change that. He looks at a woman and i'm back at being that child in an instant.
Thanks a lot for the reply.
For me, I guess one other reason I end up dwelling on the reaction is, otherwise I will have to deal with the underlying emotion coming from a past wound.
I am learning now that it is preferable to brave it and try to face the inner wounds than control things on the outside.
Its happening and slowly though.