Wow, I can't even imagine...I feel for you I really do. The OW my loser STBXH is now with kinds of gloats, but give her time with him and she won't! But this woman you speak of is psycho..o..o..o
You and your husband are together yet? You NEED to put a restraining order on this woman no matter what your husband is up to yet. That may help show his true colors in broad daylight too. I would LOVINGLY ask him to accompany his wife to go put it in place legally.

liveonce: I went to the courthouse and tried the restraing order. Was told unless she physically harmed me or my kids they couldnt do it. But I was able to get a cease and desist order. She received her copy as well. Was told by my lawyer if she steps one foot on my property to have her arrested. I had to even install security cameras outside my home. She is psycho. Not only have I had to deal with my shitty husband but this psycho he brought into our lives as well. I just want to be left alone...by both of them.

How about...go to your doctor and have him right a note that her actions are physically affecting your health?
Has she continued since the cease & desist?

I met with the OM and gave my own C&D but he didn't want his w to know (not his first A). Feel for you and suggest that you pursue all avenues C&D harrasment etc for this bitch to get the word that she isn't welcome in your familys life. IF he is to call her you should tell him what to say and be in the room when he says it!!!!

Man, she is nuts...

Hate to say it but you may hate her for some time. She may do something, eventually, that will be so damned stupid that it makes you laugh...and then you will know that you are on your way to NOT hating her as much.

Take care...L~

The next time she leaves a letter on your doorstep, call the cops. The next time she emails, etc. She is violating a cease and desist order if she continues doing these things. I would call whoever put the cease and desist order in place and tell them she persists in her attempts to harass and until more charges are brought, you doubt she will stop it.

I am so sorry that you are going through that. The OW in my case thought my H was divorced and quickly through him to the curb when she found out he was married with children. There are obviosly psychos like the one you're dealing with. You are smart and you need to outsmart her. I'm surprised your H isn't doing anything about the chidren being threatened. Have you got restraining orders yet? Any police reports? Do you know where she works? You are not going to find peace with this until she is out of the picture. Then you will need to start the healing process.

wow...I am so sorry for what you are going through....I think there are cases when its ok to hate....cases like yours!!!! you know, my H left a year ago to be with his dirty little teenage whore....they are still together....I've never said a word to her....yet, I truly hate her...I hate everything about her....I hate how her actions have effected my daughters and disrupted my life....I hate what she represents...I hate the example she is teaching my daughters....I hate her for so many things...It may not be healthy but....I would never say "let it go" to you....there may be a day when you find the strength to release your feelings into the universe and find inner peace...until then you should hate the crazy bitch for everything she has put you and your family through!

It's ok to hate - it reminds us of how NEVER to behave. I hate the whore that my husband is with - if I EVER get the opportunity to see her - it will take all I can handle to not attack her.

yeah, I have to pipe up again here and agree with rote. I think it's been YEARS but I still would not trust myself to be in a room with the OW/SPAM. I worry I would physically go after her.

Still... to this day...

Thinking on this...you seem to feel bad for hating this OW and all she has done. You really hate her and feel like it's a bad reflection on you.

Stop that. Really.

Like you, I never thought I could hate anyone like that, but I guess I do. I also never really thought I would have to deal with so many of the things I have had to deal with over the last few years. This is unprecedented for me. And you?

All we can hope is that we can handle ourselves the best we can in any situation, but damn, if we can't? We can't.

I think we all do damned good, considering...

Don't be so hard on yourself. You are human. We all are. We are dealing with the unimaginable - going thru it, and still getting up every damned day. That, in itself, is pretty remarkable.

So you hate her. She may well have pushed you to the point that she deserves it...for now.

Take care, L~

Yeah, I'm not exactly in the "kumbaya" corner today.

Why shouldn't you hate her? Who says you have to "let it go"? That's bullshit. The only people that would tell you that are people who have never walked in your shoes.

Hell, I don't know her and I hate her.

I could be wrong and I dont mean to offend to anyone.

I believe in the Biblical age, people stone the cheater and his/her affair partner to death. Today, the cheater and his/her affair partner are cherished, regardless the family they break, the harms to the betrayed, and the damages to next generation who carry the scars for the rest of their lives.

Cheating is a sin, a stain that the cheater can never wash off.

If you're thinking about a divorce then you can always write her and tell her that he's all hers because you don't want him anymore. That you're done with him.

I dont blame the other woman/women at all. My husband could have used his mouth to say "no", instead of using it for other things.

I totally understand your hatred for the OW. Really...how could u not hate a woman who knowingly has an affair with a married man. I've called the OW many times and told her what I thought of her. I've also told her co-workers and publicly posted things on her facebook page to ensure that everyone knows what she is. She goes around pretending to be this nice sweet good person but in reality she is a whore who I will never forgive. She was going around her work telling everyone that her hubby was cheating on her and how heartbroken she was. But then she did the same thing to me. My husband is just as much to blame but she was the one who started it and invited him over to her house several times to 'fix' her computer and then INSISTED that she treat him to lunch. Then it all started from there. BTW..she was also married. I hope, for all our sakes, that the hatred subsides. It's not healthy for us to obsess over this and to be filled w/ such hatred. Yet, it's easy said than done. I've tried to hard to get the slut out of my head but it's so hard. As for your case, I would just keep track of every letter or phone call she makes and hope that it will help you to take legal action against her.

I cant imagine what you are dealing with here. The OW in my case contacted me for a long time but she wanted my forgivnes. She was not like the OW in your case. What we did is simply ignore her phone calls and text messages and she stopped. You know like the bully at school when she saw what she was doing did not cause a reaction she got bored and stopped.She called my H one more time after he left her and he picked up the phone and told her "I am trying to save my marriage and I dont ever want to see or speak to you again" (I was standing right next to him). That clear message seemed to help. As for your Family members she has turnedagainst you I would have a talk with them and say really you are going to belive this crazy person who screwed my husband ? What kind of Family are you?

As for the hate, I understand and can relate to that. I have hatede in the past. As a matter of fact it was a family member who hurt me and my family to the point of almost destrying us. The only problem with hate is that it usually only hurts the one who hates not the one who is hated. So all I want to tell you is dont let the hate poisen you and your live. You most likley dont hurt her with your hate at all. She probably thinks it is funny and gets some sick satisfaction from it...