My Mrs said she thought I didn't love her because I dropped out of school, after going back late. I also saw in emails where she said I don't do anything to help financially. I have always been employed, I just don't have a high paying job. So I am thinking all the time, if only i'd managed to stay in college. She found her ex on facebook 10 months after I dropped out. Would someone cheat on you because you don't make enough money?

If someone cheats on you because you don't make enough money - then they are a fair weather friend - they are not in it for the long haul and their deep roots of love are not deeply rooted and will probably bounce around from one victim to the next.

My GF's ex didnt work for 3 years - she always worked and tried to get him to actually work. He took advantage of her.

I wish I had all the answers but I think it will take a lifetime for us all to figure out what goes through crazy peoples minds and even still that won't be enough time.

I think we blame ourselves for two reasons.

First, the other option is to blame the spouse and we don't want to believe it about them.

Second, I think deep down our mind is practical and realizes before we do that we can only fix ourselves and not other people. So blaming ourselves is productive - we can DO things right away like they might make a difference.

But as time goes on we start to realize that isn't productive because the problems are inside the other person and they have to fix them. So we have to accept that they aren't who we hoped they would be and that we have to rely on them to fix themselves and sometimes they can't or won't.