Infidelity Support Group
Any relationship in which one partner engages willfully in sexual relations with another outside of the partnership is considered to have experienced infidelity. This breach of trust is often traumatizing for the faithful partner as well as the relationship, and support is often needed to heal emotionally and to decide whether or not the relationship should continue after...
I went online to pay the cell phone bill today, and was taken aback by the # of text messages on our current bill. It isn't a cost issue, because we have unlimited texting, but in the 10 days of this current billing cycle, there are over 700 text messages. That's a lot of finger typing.
So, I pull up my account, nothing unusual.
Pull up my husband's, and there are over 500. Most are easily recognizable numbers, and he does text ALOT so it's not that unusual. However, I see a number that's both frequent and unfamiliar. I look more closely, and the first message is in the last 48 hours. Since then, there have been 117 text messages.
So, I text my husband, and ask who that number belongs to. He texts back and says it's not in his contacts and he has no idea.
OK. We were planning to meet for lunch anyway, so I just chill. When I see him at lunch, I ask to see his phone, which he willingly gives me. I search the number, and it comes up "Sara". There's only one message there, from about an hour earlier, that says "Wake up! Wake up!" All other messages are deleted. According to the online phone bill, that is the only message from that number today, and he didn't reply.
I ask who Sara is. He tells me it's the person who had the item on Craigslist that he told me about the other day (this is true). I check the info he sent me on the ad, and it's indeed the number. I ask why all the other messages are deleted. He says he just automatically deletes messages at the end of the day because he gets so many. He swears to me that he's not doing anything to be concerned about.
He promises that again multiple times over lunch.
I told him when we were walking to the car that I'm not accusing him of doing anything wrong, but I am justifiably wary of this type of situation. He says he doesn't want me to worry. I tell him that I can't control my feelings, only my reaction to them.
My instinct is to tell him to not delete any more messages from / to her. I may never check his phone again, I may check it 14 times a day. I don't want to be the snoop, but I also don't want to stick my head in the sand either.
Have any of you been in this spot? How did you handle it?
So, I pull up my account, nothing unusual.
Pull up my husband's, and there are over 500. Most are easily recognizable numbers, and he does text ALOT so it's not that unusual. However, I see a number that's both frequent and unfamiliar. I look more closely, and the first message is in the last 48 hours. Since then, there have been 117 text messages.
So, I text my husband, and ask who that number belongs to. He texts back and says it's not in his contacts and he has no idea.
OK. We were planning to meet for lunch anyway, so I just chill. When I see him at lunch, I ask to see his phone, which he willingly gives me. I search the number, and it comes up "Sara". There's only one message there, from about an hour earlier, that says "Wake up! Wake up!" All other messages are deleted. According to the online phone bill, that is the only message from that number today, and he didn't reply.
I ask who Sara is. He tells me it's the person who had the item on Craigslist that he told me about the other day (this is true). I check the info he sent me on the ad, and it's indeed the number. I ask why all the other messages are deleted. He says he just automatically deletes messages at the end of the day because he gets so many. He swears to me that he's not doing anything to be concerned about.
He promises that again multiple times over lunch.
I told him when we were walking to the car that I'm not accusing him of doing anything wrong, but I am justifiably wary of this type of situation. He says he doesn't want me to worry. I tell him that I can't control my feelings, only my reaction to them.
My instinct is to tell him to not delete any more messages from / to her. I may never check his phone again, I may check it 14 times a day. I don't want to be the snoop, but I also don't want to stick my head in the sand either.
Have any of you been in this spot? How did you handle it?
We have all been duped. I check ALL the time. Too bad if he
doesn't like it. Just do what you have to do. And listen to that little voice inside of you! It never lies.
117? wtf? and really what guy likes texting?
my text are so short in general
Do go through all of the phone records. Check the text and calls and see if he was talking to her too. How long and how much.
Maybe it is just me, but I smell a cheater.
My wife always had him call her anonymous. That too shows up on the phone bill.
They will LIE to cover their tracks. They will look you in the eyes and LIE even more. This is the way they operate. Mine would swear up and down and lie and then I would show proof, and they would still LIE!
Take his phone and text the number saying
"Do you love me"
"Did you miss me"
"Hey baby"
(You get the idea)
Her reply will give you the answer...
If it's an honest mistake, "Whoops, meant to text that to my wife, sorry" then delete message
If she comes back acknowledging it...well...make sure to swing hard