I understand. Of course you are happy for your cousin, but its hard to sit through the conversations about pregnancy, I know it makes me feel very out of place and uncomfortable.

And you are right in that people don't want to talk about your struggles with IF, its too personal and they don't know what to say. Unless they've known the struggles of IF, people don't know what to say.

As far as being in the room while others are discussing or complaining about their pregnancy, I don't think you need to stay and suffer through the awkward conversation. Just say congratulations and then find an excuse to leave the room if possible. Its so hard!! I think it helps to let yourself off the hook and not feel you have to participate in these conversations. :-)

I'm so sorry. I have been there, it is very hard because I always feel genuinely happy for others but, we want and deserve the same happiness.

Those that have experienced infertility, recurrent losses, and even late losses like me can relate. However, I have found that even many of my IF friends almost forget once they have children. I think I have learned that even though I will want to shout how happy I am with a living child (when that time comes), I will also always be aware of those less fortunate around me. I vow to never forget this journey. It has changed me, made my skin thicker, and given me courage I never thought I would have. Also, it is ok to remove yourself from those conversations. You have every right to feel how you feel...allow yourself to feel!

Thank You All for Your Replies...I was feeling real guilty about wanto walking away from the conversation but I just ...could not sympathize with her...that's not real a big issue . I would be, so happy to purchase new clothes and walk around with a glow.

Been there done that!! I know what you mean... when I was around all my girlfriends that were pregnant or just had babies it was ALL they talked about... so I couldn't even be around them. I would hang out around the boys, or just sit in the same room, but search the internet on my phone. I had no input or interest in what they were talking about. Don't feel bad or like you're unusual because of your feelings. Totally normal! And hopefully in the future they will be more aware and maybe discuss the baby stuff for a short while and move on to other things where you can actually contribute to the conversation.

Thank you for your reply...You are so right!

Oh I understand how you feel. My brother is fuming with me because he had a "hard time" getting pregnant (7 months) and I've been trying for 15 months. When I wasn't jumping up and down with joy for them-that made me a bad person. It's possible to be happy for them but sad for yourself. Some people just don't realize that. Take your time and feel what you need to feel. Sometimes taking a step back is what's necessary to survive.

I hate that battle! I was always a baby lover and loved planning baby showers but i literally got to the point where the sight of a prego literally made my skin crawl. and even after finally getting pregnant i can say that it hasnt gotten better...i mean it has some but seeing people who got pregnant by accident or smoke while pregnant makes me want to scream. Some people are so insensitive. I have an infertility ribbon tattooed on my leg and people make a*hole comments like "well what are you going to do with that tattoo now that you are having a baby"....uhhh im gona leave it there because the 5 years of TTC nearly killed my entire well being. I was spiritually and mentally nearly dead from the process so it will stay because like Melissaw said, it has changed me and I never will forgot the pain for infertility.

Thank You for Your Replies....It's really good that you still have it in you to remember and not forgot...I appreciate your comment...Nice to know...some people still care even after they have successful conceived and have healthy pregnancy.

Sometimes I think my friends think I want to live vicariously through their pregnancies. Wrongo. Doing a lot of praying and heart checking to not become bitter. Really hard when everyone keeps getting pregnant "on accident" around me.

We have been trying for over 2 years and my husband literally just has a woman come up to him at work who has been trying for 2 months and tell him "I think God isn't letting me get pregnant because I smoke, and I thought you would understand." Oh my. People.

Wow...that is not cool....they sounds like don't even begin to understand what it's like to be infertility or miscarriage ,is like.....Wow!

I hope everything works out for you and your partner.