Infertility Support Group

In vitro fertilization is one of the most common and utilized ways of treating conception problems. This support group is dedicated to those beginning their journey with IVF and needing support. Join the community and share your experiences, advice, and story with people going through similar challenges starting a family.

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Lindsey8472 02/05/2018

Hey guys. I'm brand new here. I literally just went to google and typed in infertility support groups and this page popped up. I'm 24 years old. I live in a small town where everyone gets married and pops out 2-5 kids within the first 3 years of their marriage. I got married 2 years ago, and my husband and I have been trying to have a baby for the past year.

It's not working.

I'm not ovulating. I do some months, but most months, nothing. I thought it was because of my weight. I am overweight, not obese, well I'm probably qualified as obese. I weigh about 100 pounds more than I should. I'm healthy though. I've just gotten blood work done and everything came back perfect. Hormones are fine, iron is fine, blood pressure, all that stuff. The reason that I've found this page is because no one understands what I'm going through in my little area. People say they want a baby, and poof! They have a baby. Every woman in my group of friends got pregnant within 2-3 months of trying. When I tell them of my frustrations and my fears, they're sympathetic, but they have nothing to say to me because they've never gone through it.

I feel like something is wrong with me. I'm suffering so much with jealousy right now that I can't appreciate anything good in my life. My cousin is having her baby in 20 days, and I'm not excited about it at all. My friend had her baby 3 days ago, and I honestly could care less about it. Another friend of mine just found out she was pregnant. I'm just completely surrounded by disgusting amounts of jealousy, and I can't see past it at all.

I'm not enjoying my life at all right now. I have a good life! I'm a high school teacher, and my kids annoy the crap out of me, but I love my job. I don't live in the best place, but it's affordable and I have a roof over my head. I have a car, my husband has a job, etc., etc. I have many many things to be grateful for...but I can't see any of that right now, because my jealousy is too great.

I just want a baby, and that's not happening. I just don't know what to do.

faithfulliz 02/05/2018

I think you coming to a support group is a great start. You’re not the only one. I’ve been trying for 8yrs. I’ve explored many different things and still nothing. I have to remind myself that it’ll happen because if I let it overtake me I will be in a black hole depressed.

It sucks when you’re surrounded by people who are pregnant and with their darn baby showers (which I refuse to go to)

Have you gone to a fertility specialist?

Lindsey8472 02/05/2018

thank you for replying. I didn't think anyone was going to lol. Not yet. I've gotten blood work done and everything has come back normal. My family thinks I'm just obsessing over it. I can't tell you how many times someone has told me to just stop worrying about it. Or my friends that have had babies say, "As soon as you stop worrying about it, it'll happen..that's what I did..." Except worrying about it is not why I haven't gotten pregnant. I haven't gotten pregnant because I'm not ovulating. Not worrying about it isn't going to solve that :/

faithfulliz 02/05/2018

I had posted something and was like ok maybe I won’t get a response, but I ended up getting one today lol

It’s easy for someone to say who has kids to say “stop worrying about it” what i get told all the time is “when you least expect it it’ll happen” all i say it “yea..” but deep down I’m just like -_-

Is your husband pretty supportive about the whole thing? Mine is, but it’s still kind of hard for me to express myself about the whole situation with him. I don’t know why

Lindsey8472 02/05/2018

He's supportive yeah. But he's also not as upset about it as I am. Basically if we have a kid, amazing. If we don't, that's okay too. I'm just concerned as to why I'm not ovulating. No one is really willing to give me any answers because I'm so young. They keep telling me the same freaking things over and over again.

faithfulliz 02/05/2018

It’s good that your husband is supportive. My husband tells me the same thing. “If you have a baby good if not it’s ok. “

Hey have they checked your thyroid at all?

Yorkie 02/05/2018

I am with both of you! If another person tells me to "not worry/stress about it and it will happen", I will lose my mind!!

Starting with a fertility clinic is a good start. I had issues with not ovulating as well. I was put on meds to regulate it and after 2 years, I ovulated on my own the last 2 cycles! But that hasn't helped me any yet, I have other issues like cysts. Hence why I'm so sick of people telling me not to think about it all the time when I have to! I need to take meds on specific days of my cycle, go for follicle tracking and see my doctor every month! I have to remember these things! So it's easy for them to say that but we are living through this stuff! Here's a saying that applies even better, "it's easier said than done!" I know what you mean about everyone around you having babies and such. It sucks and I'm on the same boat. It's only natural that you feel that way because that is what you want so badly. Your time will come and it will be just that much sweeter when it does. It will all be worth it! Just hang in there and vent to us as much as you need!

GOOD LUCK!!

BeaBea 02/05/2018

I think it’s good that you’ve identified the cause of your infertility: not ovulating. There’s medication for that! I agree you should see a fertility specialist or at least an ObGyn for an ultrasound, and see if they can help you figure out 1) why you aren’t ovulating, and 2) what can be done about it. It might be related to your weight or it might not. The good news is that your bloodwork is normal, you’re young, and you’ve identified the problem. You’re halfway there! It’s just going to take a little detective work, some time, a lot of patience, and maybe some pharmaceutical help to get you there. Best of luck to you. I think you’ll have a happy story to share on here someday.

Strength18 02/06/2018

Hello. Im new here also and have been trying to conceive my entire adult life with all negative results. I understand the feelings of jealousy oh too well. Ive stopped going to baby showers and I am an emotional wreck. Im more than posituve that with the correct medical team, you will be successful. I am 48 and doctors have no positive words for my situation. I wish you all the best.

iousoup 02/08/2018

I feel you, so much right now! Are we literally the same person? lol Everything you're feeling has to be normal, because I feel it too! I can't be happy for people that are pregnant, I can't stand to see children not being well taken care of, it breaks me. I joined this group recently too because no one understands what to say to someone like us. Everything they try to say only hurts more.
I started educating my friends and family on what I need from them and it has helped. I tell them, I don't need you to tell me if I just relax it will happen, or once we adopt I'll get pregnant, I need you to say, "I don't understand what you're going through, but I am here for you. I love you, and I'm here". That's all anyone needs to say!

Hugs to you, cause I know how much they mean.

Lindsey8472 02/08/2018

Hey guys! Sorry I’m just now responding back. You guys are all amazing, and it really makes me feel so much better that other people know how I’m feeling. A “friend” messaged me the other day and told me she was pregnant. She hasn’t talked to me in like a year and the first thing she said is that she’s pregnant. She sent me ultrasound pics yesterday and told me when she was due. I was asking her questions and she said they just started trying this month. Keyword, trying. She said they literally had sex one night, and she just happened to be incredibly fertile that night, and two weeks later!!!! Poof!!!!! Positive pregnancy test. It made me SICK.

lilie315 02/09/2018

You are certainly not alone. We all have similar/exact feelings to you. Most of us are surrounded by people who drink a glass of water and boom - pregnant! And then there is us - people who try every which way and it's a struggle - if successful at all! It's so hard for us to put on a smile around an expecting friend, attend any kind of baby event, or just present when other moms' are talking. I get it. I wish there was some magic words that we can tell each other and it would only work of those of us in this situation that would make us feel better. But there isn't. The only thing that you can do is surround yourself - even virtually with people in the same situation as you. Have you guys thought of going to a RE? That would probably be your next step. Maybe go somewhere outside of your town though. It might be a drive, but it's worth it for your privacy. Meanwhile, try and explain to your friends/family if you don't want to attend a baby related event that right now is a tough time for you guys, and you appreciate their understanding, but you'll attend or talk about whenever you're ready. Remember, you aren't alone!!

knm 02/10/2018

Hi there! I’m 24, as well. My husband and I have been TTC for over 2 years. I totally understand the jealousy and hurt of being surrounded by people who are able to have children. It breaks your hurt and make you want to distance yourself. Honestly I still haven’t found a way to deal with these emotions yet, but what I can say is that you are not alone. There are many couples just like you who are not able to conceive. No words can heal a heart that desperately wants a child, but please take some comfort in knowing you don’t have to do this alone. Please let me know if you ever want to talk. Kali

LEg 02/18/2018

I get where you guys are coming from! I feel like i am about to lose my mind to with people like my mom saying "it'll happen" or "you just need to stop worrying about it" or my favorite "it took me almost a year to conceive so I know what you are going through"... no you don't, my husband and i have been trying to conceive for 3+ years. I am 23 and my husband is 26. I have friends and coworkers that are getting pregnant and are just fertile myrtles that it just about kills me thinking about how easy they can get pregnant and how hard it has been for me. I just found this group and it has helped so much already seeing that there are other people out there with similar problems and I am not alone.

fffFFF 03/01/2018

I think it's time you check in with a fertility specialist to dig deeper. x

losinghope10 03/02/2018

Hi Lindsey,

I just joined right now. Yours was the first post i read. I’m a high school counselor married for 2 years and trying to conceive and it hasn’t happened.. I’m slowly losing hope that it will. I feel the same feelings of jealousy you do. Just wanted to share that you’re not alone. I’m 31 years old and idk if it will happen for me.

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