Incest Survivors Support Group

Incest refers to any sexual activity between closely related persons that is illegal or socially taboo. Consensual adult incest is very rare. Incest between adults and prepubescent or adolescent children is a form of child sexual abuse that has been shown to be one of the most extreme forms of childhood trauma. If you or a loved one is a survivor of incest, join the group...

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anger issues

manamoru
manamoru

My father sexually abused me. Does it really help to be angry at him. I have written a letter expressing my anger. I have written journals putting it all out there. But the disgust and rage does not go away. does it really help when people say get your anger out, because i try and get out the anger but its still there. I am confused. there is also this feeling of disgust and shame that i am not sure how to deal with.

notalone00
notalone00
One idea that I’ve seen at work was setting up a chair, in an open area, and picture him there. Then just cut loose. Tell “him” what you’re thinking, feeling, and what you want to do to him ( “ I really want to punch you, I want to kick you so hard you lay on the floor in Pain....... oops..sorry...)

I knew a guy that was abused by his dad... but his dad had passed away.. the guy that I knew was asked to picture him alive and sitting right infront of him... at that time, I was actually scared of this guy... I had never seen him be so upset, but after he was done venting, he told me later that it did help... but he felt embarrassed doing it in front of others...

Later that night I heard him yelling at the wall...

I hope this helps, even a little bit.
manamoru
manamoru
thanks for the feedback and support. I will try that. My dad is alive, I wish I could do it to him but I can't.
naturegirl5991
naturegirl5991
I've found that in order to keep myself safe, I need an outlet for my rage otherwise I hurt myself. Listening to angry music has helped. That's good if you don't know how to express anger. I've also found that furiously exercising has helped tremendously. But when all else fails, I let the rage fuel me. So if I have a goal in mind, I'll do everything possible to accomplish it as a way of saying "you made me feel disgusting but look at me now" to my uncle. Honestly, hateful spite has been my greatest motivator.
donnawanda
donnawanda
I had one therapist tell me that letting out your anger just keeps it going. But I do think it's impossible and unhealthy to suppress it.

There is a way to move past anger but it is not fun. Basically, anger is a secondary emotion. There is something underneath it. Sometimes I ask myself, "If I wasn't feeling angry, what would I be feeling?" And the feelings are worse than anger ... like powerlessness. But I guess it is more healing to feel what is inside you, because otherwise it is all frozen inside you, whereas when you feel it, as awful as it feels, it is releasing something.
manamoru
manamoru
thank you for your feedback and support. it helps to know I am not alone
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