I have been married for over 20 years. Most of those years I have had problems with depression - the last few years severe depression. I am seeing a psychotherapist and she has helped me to begin to understand myself. I am an introvert, intuitive, gifted and highly sensitive. I have always felt like there was something seriously wrong with me, so I tried to be who everyone else wanted me to be or needed me to be. In the process, I lost who I was. I am working on finding/accepting the *real* me. My husband is the complete opposite of me (based on the Myers-Briggs test). It has been difficult. I realized that to really *feel* loved I needed to connect with him on a deep emotional level, something that he has never been able to do. He has started to see a therapist as well to help him with this. I am cautiously optimistic as I am realizing that the kind of person I need to be with is someone who can understand me and relate to me and help me to grow. My husband is quite clueless. I wish I would have known these things about myself before I got married.

Hi Jane, although I'm not an advocate of marriage, I do believe in the philosophy of putting the right people together to make fireworks in love or business. Why do I believe in this? Because like you I've had past bad experiences of being around people I don't spark with, or who don't connect with me deeply enough. Why do I want to connect so deeply? Because like you I'm a deep person, I perceive the world around me on a very intellectual and emotional level, whereas a lot of people don't, so can seem insensitive to me. It's okay they're the way they are, but sometimes I want to be around people like me, who see the world similarly, who will understand me. I think we all need to be around like-minded people, at least some of the time, and if we're not it can lead to psychological problems. I think at least a few people on here are quite emotionally wounded from being a misunderstood HSP. This place can help you heal, it's helped me heal, I just love reading all the words of peoples stories and comments on here that just make sense to me.

I'm highly sensitive and married to someone on the autism spectrum. Ive had a bad marriage and felt unfulfilled throughout most of it. Are there any of you out there in a similar situation? How do you cope and is it possible for HSP's and autistic type people to work things out.

I struggle a lot. My husband is sensitive but not an HSP. He has trouble sometimes with my deep emotions. He tends to obsess on things and can be quite intense and it can weigh on me heavily. Being an HSP I take in too much of other people’s energy and have to get away. I don’t know how to block it. We live separate lives. I don’t really want to spend much time with my husband because I feel so weighted down. I know he feels shut out and that makes me feel guilty. I sometimes wish I had stayed single.

Beth, it sounds like a codependancy issue more then anything. The same thing happened when I would suck up the negative energy from my ex wife.

There is help for that.

God Bless