Hidradenitis Suppurativa Support Group
Hidradenitis suppurativa (hi-drad-uh-NIE-tis sup-yoo-ruh-TIE-vuh) is rare, long-term skin condition that features small, painful lumps under the skin. The disease manifests as clusters of chronic abscesses or boils, sometimes as large as baseballs, that are extremely painful to the touch and may persist for years with occasional to frequent periods of inflammation,...
I feel as though my life is being ruined not only am I sixteen and in stage three of HS, my immune system has gone down hill dramatically in the almost 5 years I've had less, and I feel like such a jerk for even feeling bad for myself because there are people on here that have HS for years WAY longer than I have and I know how painful it is and everyone here is just so incredibly strong, which is why I don't understand why I am so incredibly weak, like physcially it's getting to the point where I'm almost always sick and sleep all the time, emotionally, first off my parents don't even love me how am I suppose to find someone else that will when I'm so worthless, thats a whole other issue though, I literally have no one that cares about me, I swear I could disappear without anyone even noticing I mean nothing to anyone, and I don't even care. I'm so over myself, and I'm wondering am I the only one who feels this bad, cause I'm at the point where I'm giving up I don't even care anymore I don't even wanna feel better it doesn't even matter, I give up trying to be better. I give up trying anything at all. I must have done something to deserve this, I give up. This is how my life is going be, sometimes I swear I would be better off dead. No one would even notice anyways.
For whatever it's worth, I do care, I'm half teared-up just reading your post. I feel for everyone who goes through this. I've done a lot of research on parts of this disease that haven't troubled me personally in some time because I wish I knew how to share with others some of the successes and improvements that I've had. There is hope, including that I did meet someone who loves me no matter what disease I have (we have been together almost 20 years now), even if we only the get the hope we can make for ourselves when we're feeling up to it.
I feel really cheap wanting to say "Please don't despair" because that's exactly what this and other diseases often try their best to make us do, but please don't ever give in to this. IT doesn't deserve to win - YOU do!