Healthy Sex Support Group

This community is dedicated to an open discussion about healthy sex and sharing thoughts and feelings about sexuality and improving one's sex life. Most active adults desire to have an active and fulfilling sex life, both for themselves and also their partner. Here we discuss common sexual challenges faced by both men and women.

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27 year old female virgin

knsample
knsample

Hi one of my triggers for anxiety and suicidal thoughts is sexuality. 





I attended an all girls school for middle and high school and during this time I didn't date. This didn't bother me because of the setting I was in and I thought that once I got to college my luck would change. That didn't happen either. I didn't find a bf in college. I'm now 27 and I still have not been kissed, dated, had a bf or had sex. I'm not into casual sex because I'm a very emotional person and I want to be with someone I care about. I currently live in Chicago and have a great job with a great career ahead of me. I've tried speed dating a few times but I haven't matched with anyone yet. Dating apps don't work for me. I feel alone in the city since I don't have any family or friends here.



i feel like an unattractive loser and my anxiety has caused me to think that I'm going to be a virgin forever or that I'll become too old and that no one will want me. I'm very shy around guys and my social anxiety makes it hard for me to go up to men I don't know.


I feel like I'm destined to be alone forever.


i know it's stupid but I have contemplated suicide over this. Please help!


Barry
Barry
When I was 27 I was a male equivalent of you. except that I didn't let it get me down. I certainly did not think about suicide. Don't rush into a relationship with a man who is not caring, considerate, reliable and whom is a friend as well as a sexual partner.. Why not just get on with your career and forget about men unless someone suitable comes along? Some women (and men) find the work of Betty Dodson useful.
GreenEyes727
GreenEyes727
There is ALWAYS hope. You are not old. Get that out of your head. And suicide is NEVER the answer as I just told another member. It leaves people heartbroken. You need a new approach. First of all, you are just as worthy of love as anyone else. So put yourself out there. Why don't dating apps work for you? How about connecting with people from high school on Facebook or Classmates? I have had guys interested in me in the last few years and I am far from thin and I have a saggy neck. I'm 64. I only recently realized that I am just as good as anyone else. This is somewhat because I have watched enough videos to get it. Love is out there for everyone. And I hear you. I have not had good luck with men myself. One of my problems is that I am not approachable. I have a small mouth. It must make me look mad or sad as I have been questioned over the years. I refuse to date just to date. There has to be a clicking of the minds and there must be chemistry. My best friend met her bf on a dating app but if they don't work for you, maybe try a meetup group in your area. I have issues that keep me from dating. I've been saying I'm going to clean my house and lose weight for years. I won't bore you with my health problems. Mel Robbins is a good motivational speaker. I have put the link to one of her videos which I think is so enlightening on other posts. Let me know if you want the link. Good luck honey!
calirn13
calirn13
Join groups that interest you. Make social connections and stop worrying about dating. Be around people with similar interests.
Sometimes we need a little help. I started going to the gym. Then I got a job at the gym. Then I met my husband at the gym.
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