Healthy Relationships Support Group
No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.
Do we really have to get married/find a partner or we just do it cause society taught us this way?
I feel an enormous pressure from my family to get a husband. I feel this way since I was 16-17.. I am currently 26. My grandma often tells me how she was married at my age, how my mother was married at my age, how my aunts were married blah bah..
Everywhere i go, i see people looking weird at me, being stunned for the fact i am a single woman and without a boyfriend - nor wanting to get one.
My whole life i felt depressed cause everyone was dating and i wasnt. I thought i was ugly, i had some problem, i would end up old and alone, but all this because someone has put this thought in my head my entire life. I went into a serious depression, with suicidal thoughts because of this!
I think it's totally unfair to do this to a person! It's psychologically destructive! How I have to hear that my 16 year old has a boyfriend, how my 22 year old brother moved in with his girlfriend and i still live at home and never had anyone.
I wanted to be single and not feel bad about it. Not feel hit my people's eyes when i got out for dinner alone, when i go watch a movie alone.. anyone else experiences this pressure and know how to deal with it and specially how to talk to your family and relatives and educate them in this way.
Just because all women in my family married in their early 20's and had a bunch of kinds before they were even 30, it doesn't mean i am forced to do the same... i wish they would support me in my choices and not make me feel bad...
I feel an enormous pressure from my family to get a husband. I feel this way since I was 16-17.. I am currently 26. My grandma often tells me how she was married at my age, how my mother was married at my age, how my aunts were married blah bah..
Everywhere i go, i see people looking weird at me, being stunned for the fact i am a single woman and without a boyfriend - nor wanting to get one.
My whole life i felt depressed cause everyone was dating and i wasnt. I thought i was ugly, i had some problem, i would end up old and alone, but all this because someone has put this thought in my head my entire life. I went into a serious depression, with suicidal thoughts because of this!
I think it's totally unfair to do this to a person! It's psychologically destructive! How I have to hear that my 16 year old has a boyfriend, how my 22 year old brother moved in with his girlfriend and i still live at home and never had anyone.
I wanted to be single and not feel bad about it. Not feel hit my people's eyes when i got out for dinner alone, when i go watch a movie alone.. anyone else experiences this pressure and know how to deal with it and specially how to talk to your family and relatives and educate them in this way.
Just because all women in my family married in their early 20's and had a bunch of kinds before they were even 30, it doesn't mean i am forced to do the same... i wish they would support me in my choices and not make me feel bad...
I am basically stuck.. my family gets me stuck and the only way they would let me get out would be to a possible marriage.. otherwise I have to work and pay bills... only..
The first thing is be honest with yourself. Time to get you shit together.
Personally, I feel like settling into a committed, long term relationship is promoted universally as the "right way" to live your life. People talk as if it is a stage of development. Here, people see it as pretty normal for a 26 year old to be single, so it is not quite the same as where you live, but when we get to our 30s it is not too different.
I wish I could study but right now I lack time and money. Here is Portugal economy is really bad, we're like the shit of europe lol my salary is 400 euros, thats under 500 dollars ... and its hard when more than half of what i make is for rent and i still have bills, food etc..
My family never made much pressure for me to study, because again I was born at a time when women still were raised to become wives and not a person. I know see it differently with my cousin, whom parents do encourage her to study but with me it is different.
I know it is never too late, I can go to college at 40 and that's fine, but right now it is really impossible to pay for university, and have all the responsabilities I have. I already work 8-10 hours a day on an accountant office and I do work from home on weekends to get extra money, doing websites and related stuff.
Here it is most common to marry between 20 and 24 I would say.. but I know this changes a lot depending on the country you live in.
I think society needs to be educated and people need to start worrying with their own lives and stop annoying others. What is hard.. living on a small town, in a small island like i do... i can't even go to the mall without half my family knowing it .. a friend of a friend of a friend saw me there and called them to tell...