I have been married to my husband for 6 years. To start the platform, I do love him. We have three children together, almost 4. They are all young and all concieved within the marriage. But maybe I need a wake up call or something. My husband and I have a hard time communitcating. We are just two very different people. I was rasied in a home where there was abuse and my parents got divocred when Iw as young. The home I grew up in is not the home I want my kids to grow up in. It was very unstable in the fact we lived pay check to pay check. The power would be turned off because it wasnt paid, then we would pay the huge bill then the cable would go off, so on and so on. my mom and step dad had money but it was spent on uneccessary things. My husband ont he other hand grew up in the complete opposite way. His parents are financially sound they make good choices. They are very stable. Though they arent very physical as in giving hugs. Well my husband is very much like his parents. He like physical thigns with me (ie sex), but nothing really past that beyond kisses, and with our kids hes not super affectionate. I on the other hand am very affectionate with our kids. I want them to know how much I love them and how much they mean to me. I never had that as a child and I want them to know that everyday. We have such different parenting styles as well. He is very authortarian (not abusive at all). I would love to be more in control but its hard for me to spank because of my abusive childhood. Its hard for him to understnad me. He feels liek he has to be more stern with them because i am not. but then I feel like I have to be gentle with them because he is not. Yes we know we need to compromise but we cant figure a way to communicate to decide on a plan of action so we just get mad at each other. We cannot communicate. I am a talker and i can get very emotional, but thats me. he is the opposite (there is a trend here) not very talkcative and shuts down if I even try to solve things. I love him very dearly, and know he is a great person. but this is getting too hard for me. I dont want a divorce but I also dont want to be unhappy. I keep getting feelings of what if I married somebody else (not now but what would my life be like if I married joe not my husband). I dont want to end up divorced because we cant communicate and have the hardship from that. I try not to talk about my problems to others, but its too much for me to handle by myself.