My best friend entered back into a very absuive (mentally, emotionally, and physically) relationship with one of her Ex's. This absuer has caused Bestie to be demoted at work and forced her to drive her car while it was overheating which caused her to blow her motor. (It was a "you better get to my place by such and such time or ELSE" situation her abuser put her in.) This person has driven a wedge between her and her family / friends. They are down to isolating her as well as starting to lash out at me. 

A year and a half ago I allowed her to live with me after she left her abusive spouse. She was in counseling, had goals AND was reaching for them, and had a savings socked away. She was in a good place and started to back slide. When I brought it to her attention she just shrugged. Now she is with yet another abusive Ex. I have fought tooth and nail to pull her out of this. I am well aware I cannot. SHE has to leave the abuser. No one can make her, but her. So, I have stepped back because this is impacting me grately. Seeing someone you care about be hurt and abused is ROUGH!

I have already placed boundaries in our friendship and I've made them clear. We've talked and talked and talked. Yet, she still continues to disrespect me/ the boundaries, carelessly hurts my feelings, and takes advantage of my kindness. I tell her this and she gives me a whole, "I do not mean to, but you can leave like everyone else if you want!" I told her what she is doing is abuse by asking me to stick around while I watch her be abused and deal with her destructive behaviour. 

I am here because I need some advise or input in on how to better care for myself at this time. All of her drama is impacting me so hard. I understand she is "ill", but I cannot help but feel she doesn't care at all about me or our friendship. So...how can I stand aside and care for me and not let this impact me on such a deep level knowing she will fall further into the mess of the abuser?

Any help is much appreciated! Thank you for your time!