Healthy Relationships Support Group

No relationship is perfect. A long-term relationship requires constant effort to understand each other, fix misunderstandings, solve problems and continue to grow as both individuals change and evolve. How we deal with our misunderstandings is the focus of this community. Join us to find support, get advice, and share your experience with your relationship.

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dpressed26 09/04/2017

Hey everyone . I need help plz ! I have been married for about only few months ! But my husband calls me names , and jokes by hitting me such as slapping on the face . Spanking which left a bad bad mark and was painful as hell . Is this something to worry about or it's normal ?! I said many times don't do such . But not understanding it ! And I am getting more depressed . More than ever

sjs777 09/04/2017

this does not sound normal at all

11Christmases 09/05/2017

It's not normal. Start documenting these incidents and planning a safe exit for yourself. This is not your fault, and he is not going to change.

SunCloudJD 09/06/2017

No it's not normal.... It's abusive

geoyur77 09/06/2017

Sounds dangerous, you may need to take self defense lessons and lifting weights until you can get away from this relationship, spanking and such should be when a person requests it, i.e. Kinky or what have you, you need to tell him again and ask him if he would like to discuss with his mom or grandmother present.

calirn13 09/08/2017

What is he 12? Next time you ask him not to .. find a man 2 times bigger than he is to do the same to him.. he best be a great actor and a good friend of yours. Invade his personal space and see how he feels! Have him slap him and make it uncomfortable!
Did he do this before you got married??

dpressed26 09/08/2017

No he didn't .... that's why it's confusing

SunCloudJD 09/08/2017

It's abuse and it could get worse..... I would ask him to go for marriage counselling and if he says no I would probably leave.... and if you decide to leave please do it safely.... This guy is a bully

refurb 09/09/2017

Absolutely not normal, big trouble,
No one should hit you
Not a stranger
And most surely not someone that pledged vows to you

I don't know how to best address but I'd recommend speaking with a counselor and a women's shelter ... by yourself to get an Understanding about how to take steps and what those steps may be

And do so SOON

rmb 09/09/2017

That you are asking if it's normal is alarming. Please get help. I agree to reach out to a domestic violence organization in your area for support and resources. They can also get you some counseling.

cottontail 09/10/2017

No this is not normal and i would seriously think if you want to spend your life with someone like this.
I dont know how old you are but i am 54 and in my experience men like this do not change. Please get out before you have children and are dependent on him, then their is high risk that he will get worse. He is abusive, get out before he destroys your confidence. The warning signs are just not good. please do not waste your life like i did. Good luck

dpressed26 09/10/2017

I feel I lost the love and feelings .... after such thing ... makes me so low and down and I don't feel like getting close again . Or even kiss !

rmb 09/11/2017

Well of course. Why would you feel anything but hurt, disappointment, fear, confusion, etc towards and about someone who is abusing you?

geoyur77 09/14/2017

Hey anyone can get burned by a lover, it requires work to escape to freedom, you work is beginning, need to make a plan

yenb 09/20/2017

Be careful with him, that's not normal at all

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