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I was listening to a discussion on the radio, in regards to dating. A study conducted looked at the first date and how long it takes to evaluate your date. Per the study a majority of one's evaluation is based on personality.
Per the study it takes a woman 90 seconds to make this determination whereas with a man it takes him 5 minutes.
As men I think we're looking at being open and most importantly allowing for the benefit of doubt. LOL
On a serious side I have an upcoming coffee date this weekend and the 90 second concept has me thinking, however I also realize that it's important to be your real self, and not someone you're not.
Per the study it takes a woman 90 seconds to make this determination whereas with a man it takes him 5 minutes.
As men I think we're looking at being open and most importantly allowing for the benefit of doubt. LOL
On a serious side I have an upcoming coffee date this weekend and the 90 second concept has me thinking, however I also realize that it's important to be your real self, and not someone you're not.
Where I felt I gave them the benefit of the doubt and reserved judgement.
Yes, be yourself, for good or bad. Even a woman likes you when you aren't yourself... she still doesn't like the real you. or rather isn't give the CHANCE to like the real you.
And for the record, personality plays a HUGE part in whether I am interested in anything with that woman, including sex.
The last three or so dates I went on (prior to my current situation), felt like the woman focused on sex and I was just there to fill that role.
And the last GF I had I SERIOUSLY felt used by, in a sexual way.
So I don't see that being a gender thing. And I doubt men spend more time evaluating women than the other way around, I just put in that it was MY personal experience.
hehe.
I'm starting to see the "men are more visual" as not as true as I once did. I think women are just as visual, but are taught by society to ignore it... and it I see that changing... slowly, but still changing.
As support for that I bring forward the supposed statistic that twice as many men masturbate than women.
I found that statistic strange, and hard to believe, so I went and found the original study.
YUP! You guessed it, They ASKED men and women if they masturbated. (how else would they do it, anyway... seems obvious after the fact)
SO, wrong conclusion.. .men are twice as likely to be HONEST about masturbating than women. I think this is another instance of that kind of thinking, I think men are more likely to be honest about being visual at some stage. Women are taught that it is more shameful for them, and less acceptable.
I size up a dude by his hair and chest/arms in 5 seconds... Fuckable or not.
Datable? Take about 90 seconds of discussion - quick witted and smart = fuckable and datable.
I bet the experiment was done by showing a picture to a man or woman then asking if they would consider going out with them and timing how long it took to answer. That is different than real life.
If all a guy is worried about is whether or not I'm fuckable, I don' t want him. I'm so much more than just a piece of ass.
I think women are very visual/sexual. They just have very narrow standards as to what will pass as "hot". Basically women don't lust after a guy in a purely physical way unless he looks model-like.