On Monday afternoon my husband shot himself. He was the most loving, kind, thoughtful, considerate person I ever knew. I am in shock. I;m in a fog. I can;t sleep, barely eat, I cry all the time. I loved him so much. Oh how I wish he would have told me he felt so bad. I don't understand.

We are raising 2 granddaughters. They loved their "Papa" more than anything in the world and papa loved them. I told them papa was sick and God wanted him to go to heaven. He would never ever want to hurt them. The kids at school are already talking. I don't understand how he could do this to his girls. He loved them with all his heart. He was such a good role model.

My mother died 3 weeks ago. I was diagnosed with stage 4 cancer 2 months ago. He was my rock, He went to my doctor's appointment. I've had chemo, radiation and they're not sure the cancer is gone. He knew that. He was my rock during all of this. He insisted on doing everything for me when I was so sick. He knew how much I needed him and he wanted to help. He wouldn't let me help. I don;t understand.

He was a people pleaser

My husand was smarter than this. . I don;t understand. Why????????????