Grandparents Raising Children Support Group
This community is dedicated to grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. In cases where the parents are not willing or able to provide adequate care for their children, grandparents may take on the role of primary caregivers. Join the support group to find support, share your experience, and get advice from other members.
We're scheduled to go to court on September 30, 2011. We had a hearing for temporary guardianship on September 2, 2011 and we were denied. My Stepdaughter consented to it and we were still denied. Apparently in California judges are trying not to consent to temporary guardianships unless absoulutely necessary. We were so upset. Of course bio-mom who showed up was jumpping up for joy and calling everyone to tell them we lost, she won. We're supposed to have an investigation before our court date and it hasn't happened. I'm so nervous. Unlike many of your stories, my step-daughter doesn't have an obvious drug problem, although I suspect she's doing something. She has an apartment, a room for the kids and is currently enrolled in school full time to complete her GED. From all apperances she seems to be doing well. But when you dig a little deeper she's not, she's living with a convicted felon, smokes pot all the time, is into some other type of drug (I suspect pain killers), never has money for pampers, milk or food for the kids, although you'd think she would since she's getting welfare for them. The people she chooses to associate with are convicted felons, street walkers etc. At one point she was evicted from her apartment for not paying the rent and unusual activity at her apartment, apparently men were walking in and out all day. She can fool anyone, but not us. She's been diagnosed with reactive attachment disorder. The most she's ever had the kids is 2 nights a week and now she's insisting on having them Thursday night through Sunday morning. And that's only in anticipation of the hearing.
The sad thing is that, sooner or later, if she is addicted to pain meds and other drugs, she will do something that will place the kids in jeopardy or create a major inconvenience for someone. In our case Pinky went out and hadn't come back by Saturday night. Her then-boyfriend called my husband and said he had to go to work, that we needed to take the kids immediately. That's how we got them.
I hope you can prevail in court at some point. It's a sin the way nobody is placing the best interests of the children first. And those of us who are doing it get the shaft every time!
I really do hope we get guardianship on the 30th. I"m praying hard. The kids are in for a rude awakening should we lose. I feel so bad for them, yesterday I hugged the 4yr old and said I was so happy to have her home and she responded with "I'm happy too, I know that when I'm home with you I'm safe". I couldn't believe it. She's only 4, her mom's been insisting on taking her from Thursday 6pm, to Sunday 9am, I hate it.
Do you have a lawyer? If so, they have ways of asking your stepdaughter why she wants her kids so much. If the lawyer is any good, they'll get the "housing and food stamps" answer out of her. Hee-hee-hee.
I think my hearing in Oct is going to be my day to be heard, The AG sent me a subpoena, which is the first time ever getting one of those.
Get the old land lord to write a statement as to why your DD was removed from the apartment...Needs to be notarized. Also request hair follicle test for drug prescription and illegal.
Talk to the Judge, let him/her know your concerned with drugs. You also said the boyfriend is a convicted felon. Find out what he was in jail for. See if you can speak to his PO. and get him to write a letter. Get as much information as you can before going in that court room asking for the additional request and also ask for full guardianship. If this is what your state wants instead of temp work it!
As far as the Landlord, I can't see the Judge allowing something from two years ago as evidence.
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You're time is running out, so your going to have to work fast on the mail.
You've given your gk a home. You have been the primary caretaker for them. That should give you clout. Why after all this time does your daughter decide she wants to be a full time mom?
Ask the judge for the drug test. Use the boy friend as your concern. maybe it will slow things down, but give your daughter time to rethink what she is doing and what is in the best for her kids. Good luck!