Grandparents Raising Children Support Group
This community is dedicated to grandparents who are the primary caregivers of their grandchildren. In cases where the parents are not willing or able to provide adequate care for their children, grandparents may take on the role of primary caregivers. Join the support group to find support, share your experience, and get advice from other members.
I really want to know!!!!!
Pinky has been doing very well for about nine months. She seems to be straight. She's been coming down every weekend, helping with homework, being Super Mom, etc. etc.
She says she has a boyfriend who's a born-again Christian, has a great job, doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, is responsible, is wonderful, the whole nine yards. I've checked him online and he doesn't seem to have any legal issues. She says he's willing to sell his house in Philly, buy one in our town and raise the kids with Pinky. He sounds wonderful.
Aside from the fact that he's almost 50 years old (Pinky always goes for older mean), he's African American.
I really, honestly don't care about that. If Pinky had met him and had her three kids with him, that would have been fine. He would have been there from birth, and the kids would have grown up with the same mom and dad. Life would have been normal.
But they didn't. They grew up DIFFERENT.
And because he's black, he's DIFFERENT. And our three grandchildren have dealt with DIFFERENT since they were infants. Living in a rehab. Living with Mommy alone. Living with Mommy and Boyfriend #1, #2 and #3. Living with "Daddy" in Texas. Living with drugs and alcohol.
For the past five years they've been in a normal family. Stable. With a male and a female who are related to them,
Will they be freaked out if they go to live with an African American "daddy"? I don't know. I hate to even think this. But to me, the last thing they need is DIFFERENT.
Am I being overly sensitive? Am I being racist? Can you all give me some input?
Thanks!!!!!!!
Pinky has been doing very well for about nine months. She seems to be straight. She's been coming down every weekend, helping with homework, being Super Mom, etc. etc.
She says she has a boyfriend who's a born-again Christian, has a great job, doesn't smoke, doesn't drink, is responsible, is wonderful, the whole nine yards. I've checked him online and he doesn't seem to have any legal issues. She says he's willing to sell his house in Philly, buy one in our town and raise the kids with Pinky. He sounds wonderful.
Aside from the fact that he's almost 50 years old (Pinky always goes for older mean), he's African American.
I really, honestly don't care about that. If Pinky had met him and had her three kids with him, that would have been fine. He would have been there from birth, and the kids would have grown up with the same mom and dad. Life would have been normal.
But they didn't. They grew up DIFFERENT.
And because he's black, he's DIFFERENT. And our three grandchildren have dealt with DIFFERENT since they were infants. Living in a rehab. Living with Mommy alone. Living with Mommy and Boyfriend #1, #2 and #3. Living with "Daddy" in Texas. Living with drugs and alcohol.
For the past five years they've been in a normal family. Stable. With a male and a female who are related to them,
Will they be freaked out if they go to live with an African American "daddy"? I don't know. I hate to even think this. But to me, the last thing they need is DIFFERENT.
Am I being overly sensitive? Am I being racist? Can you all give me some input?
Thanks!!!!!!!
Pinky also has issues with her mother (and so do we). It was with her mother that Pinky first experimented with drugs, because at the time her mom was living with a coke addict. She's a real sweetheart!
Now Pinky's mother calls and complains that the kids don't call her EVERY DAY. HAHAHAHA!
When Pinky took off on her live-in, her mom and stepfather came to pick them up. They called my husband and said they would drop the kids off in an hour and a half.
That was how quickly my husband's three-month-long retirement ended, how our finances went right down the drain (furnishing kids' rooms, clothes, toys, books, etc.) and how our lives changed forever.
My best to you, I too have a daughter who makes very poor choices.
Michelle