Gastric Bypass Surgery Support Group
Gastric bypass (GBP) is any of a group of similar operative procedures used to treat morbid obesity, a condition which arises from severe accumulation of excess weight in the form of fatty tissue, and the health problems ("co-morbidities") which result. If you are considering gastric bypass or have had it, join the community where we share our experiences and find support.
So, I've had a challenging week. It started with last weeks kidney stone episode ... so I havent been eating pretty much at all (back to just pushing fluids, constantly) and I am exhausted. Then today I take a huge blow to my self-esteem which just makes me realize that I have a lot of self-image body issues that I am going to have to deal with.
The back story ... I am into a guy at work. We have been friends for some time now, and he knows about my surgery. Last weekend, before the kidney stone episode we went on a "friend date" ... had dinner, saw a movie. It was a great night, I really enjoyed myself and I think he did as well.
Then I get sick, he texts me regularly to see how I am doing and then offers, last night ... to pick up dinner and a movie and come spend time with me at my house this weekend. A nice gesture, he's a nice guy.
Well, here comes the blow ... his boss - a woman who had lap band by the same surgeon who did my GBS - goes and asks one of my close friends if I like this guy. My friend evaded the question, because it really isnt any of her business ... and her response was ... "Well, he isnt for her. He has issues with the way the women he dates look." As in, I am not thin and beautiful, so there is no point.
I dont get it. I dont get why I am so crushed by this. I've lost (by this time) around 50 pounds. I think I look loads better and I have been feeling better about myself lately. Before the kidney stone episode I had more energy, I just felt healthier ... physically and mentally.
But its over. I am still the fat girl. And even when I become the skinny girl, I dont know if that will change.
The back story ... I am into a guy at work. We have been friends for some time now, and he knows about my surgery. Last weekend, before the kidney stone episode we went on a "friend date" ... had dinner, saw a movie. It was a great night, I really enjoyed myself and I think he did as well.
Then I get sick, he texts me regularly to see how I am doing and then offers, last night ... to pick up dinner and a movie and come spend time with me at my house this weekend. A nice gesture, he's a nice guy.
Well, here comes the blow ... his boss - a woman who had lap band by the same surgeon who did my GBS - goes and asks one of my close friends if I like this guy. My friend evaded the question, because it really isnt any of her business ... and her response was ... "Well, he isnt for her. He has issues with the way the women he dates look." As in, I am not thin and beautiful, so there is no point.
I dont get it. I dont get why I am so crushed by this. I've lost (by this time) around 50 pounds. I think I look loads better and I have been feeling better about myself lately. Before the kidney stone episode I had more energy, I just felt healthier ... physically and mentally.
But its over. I am still the fat girl. And even when I become the skinny girl, I dont know if that will change.
Oh, and say NOTHING to the bitchy boss. It will make her crazy if you just smile and be super sweet to her. You know, she only wants to make you and probably everyone else as miserable as she is. And your friend has been watching too much Jerry Springer... just sayin...
FYI you are very beautiful ! I have know more to say that is bull shit you are so so beautiful......
http://www.dailystrength.org/c/Gastric_Bypass_Surgery/forum/11333266-abcs-dealing
hugs
Rhonda
The guy is into you - don't cancel, you will be sorry if you do. It wouldn't be fair to him as he has no clue what the psycho said. She liklely has a thing for him and is jealous.
Have fun!!!
You will stop being the "fat girl" when you don't think about YOURSELF that way.
Would you talk about your bestfriend or family member that way?
Anybody who tears you down is not worth your time.
Be kind to yourself. Understand your value, beauty and brilliance no matter what your size and the rest of the world will see it too.
Go out with him if you like him and have a good time!
Men, boys, guys, whatever you wanna call them, like Rath said, do not spend time with girls they don't like. They are usually pretty see-through. I find it incredibly hard to believe that he would be offering to bring you dinner and hang out at home with you if he genuinely didn't want to spend time with you.
Maybe he is hot for you. Maybe he just really enjoys your company. In any case it's a good thing. Some of the most wonderful relationships I have seen developed over time out of really wonderful friendships. You just don't know what the future holds. What you do know, however, is that he wants to be with you this weekend and you would really love that. Sound like a win-win to me!
Whatever happens this weekend or with this one guy, remember how many people there are in this world. If he is "the one" for you, yeah! If not, it's just a matter of time before you find someone who is.
Also, start to let in everything we all have been saying to you. Really let it in. This is who you are babe! You freaking rock!
Love you tons!!!
Jenny
Got to clean the house tonight. :)