I look forward to my WLS Program group support monthly meeting. It will be tonight from 5:30-7:30, we usually break into groups and just talk about WLS and stuff like that for 45 min the surgeons talk for 15 or give us time to ask questions if they are there from 5:30-5:45. If you have never met with the surgeons they take you into another room when the small groups are going on so you can ask more questions of the two surgeons. At 6:30 we then have a guest speaker. This month it is on pilates. We have done plastic surgery, exercise equipment, zumba, nut stuff, goal setting, holiday eating.
We usually have 70 or more people turn out for our meetings but it depends on what month it is too. Since this is so close to the 4th and people in Spfld usually work for the state and take the first week of July off since it's the beginning of their new fiscal year we might not have as many people tonight. We wear name tags with our name on it and a color coded cirlce that means you are a sleeve, band or RYN or thinking of that procedure if pre op.
I have seen people that are skinny there and those that aren't that are post op. I don't judge anyone and they discourage people from saying I have lost this amount of weight in this amount of time to those that aren't loosing as quick. It sure doesn't make them feel better. We talk about protein shakes, challenges stuff like that. We usually break into groups by procedure and have a mix of pre op with post ops to help the pre ops out with questions they might have.
I do think if you don't follow your WLS programs plan you will stop loosing. The surgery is only on the gut and not the head so if you have eating issues it won't help with that. I go to a circle of excellence program so they just don't do surgery on anyone either. You have to be team approved by the nut, psych, surgeon and bariatric physical therapist all saying you are ready for WLS before they will even turn your paperwork in and they tell people it can take 6months to a year to be team approved. It took me 2 months to be team approved. I did everything they said cause I wanted this surgery. I changed what I was eating pre op from Feb to June and lost 47 pounds pre op also. I quit diet soda, switched to decaf coffee and tea, and other stuff cause they told me I had to if I was gonna have WLS. I did whatever they said cause I wanted it and was hoping to have my sleeve surgery in June of 2011 which I did.
Everyone at my support group is friendly and nice and it is open to everyone even people from other programs. I did have one time where a person from a diff. WLS program came and was in our group and just bad mouthed Memorial WLS program the entire time. My thought was "why are you here then?" we tried to move the conversation along that month. It was a bummer and I did say something to pysch person at my one year appt about it and she said to let her know if this happens again with this person and to point them out to her. I told her I would.
I think everyone is different and you can't compare yourself to anyone else when loosing which is hard. My WLS program didn't say you gotta loose this much weight pre op or post op. I never did get a goal weight from them for post op either. THey say as long as you are healthy and off medicines then you have met their goal. It drove me nuts not having a number to focus on so I had my own personal weight goal to shoot for and they thought it was a good weight for me, 130 at 5'4".
My program is great. Recently we had a focus group two months in a row where some WLS paitents were ask to be part of this group to help them with new ideas and suggestions. I sat in and contributed to the focus group and it was great. We ran out of time so we had to meet again the next month and still didn't get through everything. I am so glad I have a wonderful program that wants the paitents suggestions. I am so blessed living in a town with this program.

That's an interesting observation Becca. As you know from prior posts, I go to our monthly support groups (I have one tonight actually.) There is always a mixture of pre and post op patients. Going keeps me in check and accountable. I think it is very important to hear from folks who are 5 and 6 years out and have kept it off... better still to hear from those who found themselves slipping back into old habits and caught themselves. A few months ago I was amazed that a gal who was 2 months out was giving tips on the "healthiest" things to eat at McDonalds and Chic Fil A. Those, Becca, are likely the folks who are months out and have lost only 30-40 lbs. You are determined and have educated yourself. I do recommend in person groups as another tool to success. Kathy

Wow! I am going to say it again... You all are just AMAZING!!

I met with my NUT this am (last one!) and I asked her about this... She said a couple things...

1. Many successful people quit coming to the support groups after about a year or so and just pop in once in awhile when they feel they need the extra boost of support.

2. Some people who NEED the support group don't come because they are embarrassed because they are not following the plan.

3. From her experience, the people who are most successful start working on the head stuff and new habits long before surgery... Some do this, some don't.... And some, just, well, never get it.

4. Slow or fast, if you stick with the program, the pounds will come off. And meeting my personal goal (185 for me - I am almost 5'10") is very doable as long as I keep on keeping on.

Thank you again for all your sharing!! And Pam, your support group sounds awesome!! So cool you were able to be involved in the work group!

what a great discussion! thanks to everyone for the thoughts and personal journey stories. every day on this site, I find something helpful. My husband is probably tired of me saying "today, on my support group site . . . " ;)

I have been told that altho our surgery is a wonderful tool it is in fact just a tool. If we don't stick to plan and do what we know we are to do it may not have the desired results. I too plan to be an EXobese person!
I've messed up a few times but I'll keep coming back to my plan.

I only went to the support group here once. I was completely turned off when the leader told everyone how she ate mac and cheese and puked and keep doing it till her pouch accepted it........then the lady next to me said she wished she could get sick on most foods like I did to help her not eat so much. Not to mention the 45 people at all different places and the conversation on going out drinking and how to drink more and not get sick blablabla .........yep I walked out it was with in 6 mths of my first surgery and I so didn't feel well and got so turned off by the "this is only to loose weight fast and not work" ........that is what I think is the reason many regain. I hear it is natural to gain a little though after you get to the natural stop mark.

I am from a center of excellence as well, but my support group is not good at all. I stopped going, as I didn't feel that it was supportive, but rather a class that they preached at. And while some of the information was good, it was like going to a weight watchers meeting all over again, with information that was not at all pertinent to people who don't eat "normally". I expressed concern over their "education" and harping on calories rather than food content, but it was like talking to a brick wall. And I was also bothered with the fact that we didn't ever have time to talk about our issues. We only ever talked about "the subject".

So because of this even though I am "successful" or at least so far I am, I am not going. I think that depending on the group, that successes will come and go depending on what they get from the group.

Hi, hon!! I think your observations were right on target as was your nutritionist.

In my F2F support group, there are 3-5 of us who hit our target weights and are staying there. My group meets twice a month and I used to be there every time, but haven't been for a few months because I am too busy with school and work.

There are people in my F2F group who added too many carbs at 4 months and stalled out their loss. Sadly, they continue to justify what they are eating, like they can argue their bodies into losing weight without doing the deal. A couple times I've actually said, "So, how's that workin' for ya'?" I got startled looks but nothing changed.

No one can want it for you more than you want it for yourself.

WORTH IT!!

JJ

I go to a Center of Excellence as a pre-op but I have not been very impressed with mine. One time they had Bra Fittings, what on earth was that about? Men couldn't get anything out of that, for those that had wls and planned on attending. Other than that, I am very pleased with the Center. My surgeron is one of the top in his field so I feel good about having my surgery. I just wish the support group that meets monthly was better.

Becca, what a great topic. I have just learned that the hospital where I had my surgery has started post-op group meetings, I was planning on going to the next one if it was held at a time I could make it. Now if/when I go I will be better prepared (I think) for what to expect. At six weeks out I also don't plan on failing. I do not have a "goal" weight that I am working to, I just want to be healthier and have more energy, and move more and having been obese ALL my life I don't know what number on the scale will fullfill these goals, hopefully I will know it when I get to it.

While preparing for this surgery I was told that I wasn't a teenager anymore and I couldn't expect to get down to my teen weight. At a group meeting with the nut we were told we could eat everything we eat now, only smaller amounts (this in response to a woman who said she was eating poutine every day because she couldn't have it after surgery). I was shocked, why would I want to eat everything I am eating now? this is how I got and stayed fat. I decided right there that I need different support and that's why I went on-line.

Dang! I always ramble on and get off topic. I just want to say that, like you Becca, I plan on being successful. I lost 60 lbs pre-op and worked on changing my habits and changing WHAT I ate and portion size rather than calories. Now I am just trying to find what my pouch will let me eat, and trying to get the most nutrients from what I eat. Ooops, rambling again. Anyway great thread, thankyou

Excellent Topic Becca, it is so essential to follow the plan although you can deviate from it when and it necessary with the approval of your surgeon and nutritionist. I had to because I got stuck in the Puree stage and couldn't advance due to complications with food getting stuck etc., my frustrations went through the roof and finally I spoke with my surgeon who said it is okay to slow my rate of progress down until I felt comfortable advancing. She said it is perfectly normal for some people to remain in the Puree state 2 months if necessary. I am now out of the Puree stage but I didn't try to compete and keep up with anyone elses rate of progress and I remained on course with the plan until I felt confident that I could progress out of it.

I don't know what makes people go off track and disregard the plan all I know is that it has been my lifeline and it works. I do know that life happens everyday and everyone is different with different life situations to deal with and I can't put myself in their shoes because I am way too busy dealing with my own. This past month I lost 4 family members and I can remember a time when that alone would have put me in an emotional eating binge but by God's Grace, I stayed my course, dealt with the losses and never missed a beat.

Support plays a huge part in this journey whether realized by most or not. If you are surrounded by negativity it can be detrimental to those who are not as strong as others. All I can say is you have to value you more than you do others and make yourself a priority. I am presently reading Dr. Phils Life Code and I am telling you this is an awesome book that addresses life behavior and sifting through toxic relationships etc., and it has helped me to realize that life is short, i've spent far too much time putting other people first. It has helped me realize that I am an enabler and that there are people in this world who are baiters that pull and pull and pull on you because they have this sense of entitlement and they know your weaknesses so they do it because they can. It teaches you to value yourself and give people back there mess. If you clear the clutter from your life then you can put your full attention on yourself and succeed at the things that are important to you. I recommend that everybody read this book but only if you are fully ready to deal with you and where you are at in your life.

I pray for continued success for all of us because this journey is not easy, it takes commitment and dedication. The world is going to go on regardless and people will be people but how important is this to you, that is the ultimate question!!!!!

Tami said: "I don't know what makes people go off track."

I'm sure it's different for every person who goes off track. For me, I can envision it being a time when life is so crazy that I simply don't have (or take) the time to plan and carefully prepare my meals. It would be so easy for me to fall into a fast food/grab whatever I can find mode. It happens. If I stay there too long, I'm in big trouble. Writing this out reminds that it would be useful to spend some time thinking about that and making a plan for how I would handle it.

Thanks for the thought!

Ruby you are absolutely right. That is my biggest issues if i were to pin point one. Planning meals around busy schedules and life. I find that i pick up smart ones, atkins diet meals or healthy choice meals just so that I can grab a meal i don't have to think of putting together myself when my schedule is hectic. On other days I get up, have my oatmeal before i leave home take my lunch bag throw in water, protein bar, something quick for lunch thats not challenging to my pouch, some kind of fruit and out the door i go. There are alot of twist and turns to keeping on track and its not as easy as some may think.

I have lost only 50 lbs. I know what some of the reasons are. First, my hips hurt so bad I can't get the exercise like I would like to. It has depressed me and I am working on motivating my self to take a water arobics class and hope that that will help. Second, I am not interested in food, you would think that would be a good thing, but I think I am not eating enough to keep the metabolic rate up there, especially protein. I am doing better with protein shakes but have a long ways to go. Third, I still love sugar items and am really having a problem kicking the sugar habit.
I am not giving up and so far, thank God, I have not gained any weight back. I will do this. There is only one support group in my area and they meet once a month, I have not gone. I have thought of joining weight watchers just to beable to get some support. What do you all think?

Thanks.

Jean