Gastric Bypass Surgery Support Group

Gastric bypass (GBP) is any of a group of similar operative procedures used to treat morbid obesity, a condition which arises from severe accumulation of excess weight in the form of fatty tissue, and the health problems ("co-morbidities") which result. If you are considering gastric bypass or have had it, join the community where we share our experiences and find support.

1,486 Members

40,160 Posts

0 Online

aloharada 02/26/2013

Well it happened to me....kept putting off telling people about my upcoming surgery and for some reason I let it slip to a friend yesterday. I am still pre-op and don't even have a scheduled date but mentioned that I was on the path. Her emediate reaction was scowl followed by a "I wish you wouldn't!...You should read this book that i'm reading, it tells us about how everything we eat is poisoning us and killing us and making us fat."
I'm just listening to her go on and on and then she starts to tell me about this person or that person who did it and looked great but ended up gaining back everything they lost and then some. "I should give you their email so they can tell you their experience and how they wished they never did it."
Ugh....why did I open my mouth!? I was fine...excited...READY for this change!! Its things like this that make you wonder if your making the right decision....maybe this diet will work this time...maybe I can do it without the surgury!
But then I woke up this morning and realized that all this negativity that has me questioning my decisions came from a person that has only ever had to lose 50lbs at most! And even when they had this weight to lose (according to them) they still looked great to me! They don't know the struggle i've had since childhood! The fact that I have tried every diet and medication I could get my hands on. That I eat really healthy most of the time (i'll admit the occasional unhealthy choice..who wouldn't) that I haven't drank any type of soda or diet soda or fruit juice in over 13 years and still never seen the scale move an inch....people just clasify me as a lazy person that stuffs whole cakes, bags of chips, and gallons of sodas down my throught daily! They don't know that 3 months ago I built (with a team of course) 11 house from the ground up...blood, sweat, and tears for 11 months... 10 hour days and I only lost 2 pounds the entire time. So I am 100% sure that this one person cannot tell me that all I need to do is read this book!! I KNOW that the tool I need to get me where I NEED to be so that I can live a healthier life is WLS!!!

Whew...sorry...about all that!! My tiny comment turned in to a full blown venting session!!! LMAO

deleted_user 02/26/2013

Yep, you talked yourself through it. Didn't need our help at all! You've already got this thing beat. Good for you!!

deleted_user 02/26/2013

Like Clarie said, you did a great job talking yourself through it. You will encounter many supportive people, and many like this person, that think they have to talk you out of a terrible mistake. Be strong, you are doing great!

aloharada 02/26/2013

LOL! Thanks Claire...I didn't realize I had actually talked myself through it until I re-read my post. LOL! I guess I just got so worked up it all started coming out!

aloharada 02/26/2013

Thanks "lovetoquilt" I can't wait to run into the supportive people! That is why I love all of you here. You all have made my decision process so much easier...in fact I even told my mom that she should join this group just so she can see the support and all the positive vibes. :)
Thanks again!!

deleted_user 02/26/2013

Also, if you have seminars in your area or group meetings, go to them. Take your mom or whoever you would like to go.
Best wishes.

aloharada 02/26/2013

Thanks Shirley! Thats a great idea! I need to look into that!

Picklelilly 02/26/2013

It's crazy how one comment can derail us and get us thinking we are going down the wrong path. You are so right...this is your journey, you have lived with the weight battles, the failed diets, the workouts that make little or no difference. I was the same way and finally realized that RNY was my last hope or I would become diabetic, gain 6-10 lbs each year etc etc. A close friend I chose to tell actually screamed "No that surgery is not for you, it's for people like me!" and cried. I didn't discuss it with her again and now she see's how well I've done and that I'm 40 lbs lighter. You go girl!!!! You are doing a wonderful thing for YOU!!!! Kathy

aloharada 02/26/2013

Thank you Kathy! But just out of curiosity...what did your friend mean by "the procedure being for people like her?" if you don't mind me asking.

deleted_user 02/26/2013

First time I let it slip, same reaction
Went thru the mess in my head of doubt and came out like you!
Good job!
There is no way I was gonna lose this weight without WLS
I just say how lucky I am! We are!!

imjj4short 02/26/2013

The world is full of ignorant people.

Having GBS was one of the bravest, wisest things I've ever done. It has given me the tool I need to live a normal life as a healthy person.

Glad you have a place to vent!!

You are gonna rock this thing!!

JJ

deleted_user 02/26/2013

Venting here is good for you, and you talked yourself through staying on the path you've chosen for yourself. I wasn't surprised by some of the negative comments I got when people heard about my surgery. I was however surprised at the amount of propel that we're supportive and said good for you. The positives far outweighed the negative ones.

Thepbourn 02/26/2013

Someone said to me today brace yourself for anything and everything to be said to you from post op on. The same people who snickered behind your back and called you fat/obese are the same ones who are going to tell you how awful you look skinny or they miss the old you. The friends/family that you have now that are obese like us will feel some kind of way about you because they are going to feel like you are leaving them behind and no one wants to be fat alone. Discouragement is going to come and go but I think you've got this nailed down like I do. You know where you've been and all the obstacles you've endured being weight challenged - so you pray about this, close your eyes and take the plunge.

From the day I attended the first wls and joined this site the majority of my indecision faded away. This is not like those jenny craig commercials where your not quite sure the skinny guy was ever the fat guy and/or girl. We get to see the progressive weight loss and the success stories - talk to vets who have been where we are going.

I have avoided taking risk all my life because even bondage has it's own level of security - but at what cost?

Let the naysers speak, thank them for their advice and concern and then go forward and prosper from your decision. You rock sweety, and God's got you.

KatLin 02/26/2013

Im confused why is your friend not fat or dead. her book says our food is making us fat then the only way to avoid it is not eat so bam dead. I find people who never had a weight issue very strange. they dont get it but cant bring themselves to say your obese and I dont understand why flat out with out a sugar coating.

Picklelilly 02/27/2013

Aloha- My friend is considerably overweight and trying to lose with no lasting results. I was also overweight but "wore it well", the people who I did confide in were often surprised that I was a candidate. My friends sister had GBS 12 years ago and died from breast cancer 5 years ago-- so perhaps the thought of GBS reminds her of the sibling she lost. I see so much of myself in your post, especially how you worked you a.. off building a house and lost 2 lbs!!!! You are making a great decision :) Kathy

deleted_user 02/27/2013

Yep, those people are out there.. ignore them!! I have a friend who had the lapband, she lost 100 pounds, the band slipped.. so she immediately got the sleeve done.. to maintain her weight loss.. and she's in my face telling me DONT DO THIS!!! Sure.. its easy for her to say it to me NOW that she's at her goal weight and I'm over here 150 away from mine. People will talk.. let them. i refuse to let anyone try to make me doubt my decision to do this.. and dont let anyone do it to you!!

surround yourself with positive people.. this place is FULL OF THEM.. and keep your chin up and keep chugging along till you get there!!!

Join the Conversation

Posts You May Be Interested In

Food Allergy?

Posted by: deleted_user

Last Reply: Iafaforallergy 08/21/2026

7

My 6mo twin DD's are EBF and just started rice cereal on the first. Everything has been going fine except this morning one of them had a diaper rash (lots of redness around her anus). I read this as one of the signs of an allergy. BUT I did just buy a different brand diaper yesterday (which they have used randomly before w/no issues). Do you think its the cereal or the diaper? Im ready to start...

Food Allergy?