Oh Nancy I am so sorry. I know you are stressed and sad and overwhelmed, and I wish I could fix it! As tempting as escaping into gambling seems, the temporary relief rarely ends well. (been there) When I'm in emotional turmoil and my addict wants me to go back to old habits, it helps me to write everything out, no edits, just letting it go. Maybe write about things like what would happen if I let myself gamble? How would I feel walking in? How would I feel when I left the place? What would I have gained? What (besides money) would I have lost? When I see it all in black and white on the page in front of me, I can usually regroup, take a breath, and figure out the next right thing to do. You might consider some temporary extra safety measures - maybe give someone else control of your money for a while? Revisit some of the strategies you used when you first stopped gambling? I don't know what will work for you, but I hope that whatever you do you will take good care of yourself, as impossible as that may seem right now in the frenzy. We are with you!

Sorry for your situation Nancy as my dad died of cancer when I was a teenager. It is very traumatic and you feel helpless. You will never get the high or release you once got from gambling and that is just a fact. We all continued to chase that initial buzz but that’s just what we do. When we finally grasp that all we are doing is chasing and not really living things get clearer and clearer. No one can ever take away your clean years whatever you do but why put yourself through all the pains of withdrawal when you know it is inevitable that is where you are destined if you decide on a few days of escape. The high we once got can never be caught again. Give yourself a chance to clear your head and not act on your emotions. I wish you the best and pray for your mothers recovery. TC

I am sorry you are going through this. When my mother was diagnosed with lung cancer 20 years ago I was very upset that she chose treatment. She was also in denial that she would get well because the doctors lied to her that she would get better; her last 3 months would have been better had she not gotten treatment and maybe she would have lived longer since the treatment killed her. This was our experience. I know when I have the overwhelming urges to gamble and want to do something rash, well I have done both things. I have just blindly driven to the casino and broke my 19 month sobriety or now with 9 months when I have that overwhelming urge I call or text someone anyone who understands. The last person said what yestoecovery said, play it out to the end. . sometimes just voicing it makes it lose power.. I just try to remember the racing heart and the scrambled brain that will be mine if I gamble, and the hell of day one again, I am praying for you to fell better to keep your sobriety and find some healthy alternatives, I visit a friend in the nursing home and take her out for the day. that is a much better use of my time.

I hope you have found success and peace.

My mother passed away 11 years ago. At that time I was juggling my recovery from gambling with my complete denial that my mother was actually dying. The details leading up to her death were right there in my face; somehow I decided hospice meant she could go home, and we could care for her there, not that she was going to die so quickly after making it home.
Why am I telling you this? It’s all so sad. Denial is real. It’s almost like being in shock. Maybe it’ll help you to understand your parents denial, I don’t think we know when we’re in it.
My gambling addiction caused my mother pain. She knew about my addiction and she knew I was in recovery. My whole family knew. I can’t tell you for sure how long I remained in recovery after she died. I really can’t. Denial? Maybe.
Bottom line to this story is gambling continued to destroy my life after I began feeding my addiction again. It never helped to make my life a better one.
I’m over two years in my recovery this time around. Not two easy years. But two better years.
Please don’t let denial convince you that gambling is a good idea. Thank you so much for sharing with us.