Food Addiction Support Group
An individual suffering from a food addiction disorder frequently experiences episodes of uncontrolled eating, or binging, during which they may feel frenzied or out of control. They will eat much more quickly than is normal, and continue to eat even past the point of being uncomfortably full. Binging in this way is generally followed by a period of intense guilt feelings...
I guess that I am breakng my cherry with this post. As of yet, on line groups have not intersted me( who am I kiding, they have scared and intimidated me). Here goes nothing...
There seems to be little point in sharing with those who can't relate, that I have an eating disorder. It feels that it can be more detrimental to open up and share this part of myself with people who cannot relate, than it would be to say nothing. I'm not sure if it is because I am a man, or just the general stigma shrouding disorded eating, that when I've said to friends - "I have an eating disorder" , I feel shameful and out of sorts.
I do feel , however that i need to share my story and expose this shame. To let let this monster inside my gut breath.Perhaps its not a monster at all! It just needs air and sunshine.
I have been around a while. I thought that all I needed was to eat normally, then all would be back to normal in my life. Well, the guilt and shame assosiated with food and eating began when I was 20 ish --I'll be 52 soon. For the most, I do eat farly normaly these days as I have had much counciling, self help, self medication, and a general stoburnness, bordering on obsession, with figuring out why I am like I am and what i can do about it. Yet still.... here I am. It has been almost three weeks now since coming out from a 3 month binge( in isolation) of cocaine and glutony ( I used to term this "pig out and Puke).
I was sure ( hoping at the time) that this last time would kill me. I wanted to disappear forever. Would rather have not been born actually.
I feel better now. Hope has returned. I am still scared. I can't do this alone. One day at a time I can be honest and express to the world, humbley and without shame...hey this is me-this is who I am.
I must stop talking about myself for now.
With all the love I can muster,
Mike T
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So mad at Xfinity! They're trying to charge me $115 per month for the same service I had been paying $50 the last four years. I took the equipment to UPS for shipping and cancelled my subscription today! Next door was a cookie shop called Crumbl. I had heard of it before but never went in until today. I don't need one more sugar fix, but maybe it will help with my sad) grieving heart....$15...
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I know this is stupid, but after not being able to find a job after graduation for almost two years, I ended up just taking an online teaching job because I couldn't find anything in my field. I was trying to get out of teaching and I feel so devastated. I felt this crushing feeling when I signed the paperwork and when I was in the meetings. I know that sounds so dramatic but it is how I felt. It...
never feel embarrassed about sharing your story...it can help someone else...
I do not do the pig and puke...I just do the pig and poop....in other words I am not bulimic and because I did not purge the calories I ate I am around 265lbs again...I have been bigger and I have been much smaller....result of some surgery....not barriatric surgery but surgery that knocked the desire to eat out while in pain from surgery on knee and shoulder....and hand....
I want to lose weight as I did when that was my situation where I did not want to eat....but I gained all that back....this is my normal weight 265....been here much of the adult life since 30yrs old and I am 62,,,,,
hope I helped by sharing....maybe look into OA....it is where others with eating issues share their recovery with the twelve step program that came out of AA....it works if you work it....