I have not bbeen to sleep yet pain and anxiety are both thru the roof I can not deal :(

Morning Leo,
I do have a lot of trouble saying NO, as I think a lot of us do. I wonder if it has to do with not wanting to be thought less of (if that makes any sense). WE CAN STILL DO EVERYTHING. But we can't and we pay. So much for deep thoughts, huh?

AngelaJo,
I'm sorry to hear that you're having some pain and anxiety problems this morning. You have been doing a lot the last couple of days...hopefully you'll find a way to rest today. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Still sore with "stuff" coming up this weekend...and I just can't say NO to it. :-) Oh, patient alpha is progressing ahead of schedule...raising heck and taking names!

In the immortal words of one of our many great first ladies, "JUST SAY NO!".

Kel

Good morning Leo, Saying NO is difficult. I think it's something we all need to retrain our brains to do. Maybe today is the day I go redhead and figure out how to say NO???? I pray you find some relief today. Try to rest (I know that isn't easy) and take care of you first.

Lisa

Angela, sending you as much healing as I can.
Kel, oh you are just killing me. I didn't even realize I was echoing Nancy Reagan!
LGB, hmmm, redhead isn't so bad....

I have a ton of appointments in September, all delayed from June-July. I just saw my calendar and went "Oh .... No!" I can't reschedule mos to fthem (specialists), but... Well, hopefully Mom will maintain and I won't have to feel horrible guilt that I'm not doing enough for her or something.

So has anyone else ever asked this vital question:

How can the solitaire app have a *multiplayer* option? Seriously, think that one through....

Years ago I learned to say "no" after years of being in the hospital more than I was out so I have no problem saying "no" to others on things I can't do. Problem is too many things I have to do no one else can do that I end up forcing myself to do things that I don't feel up to doing but not because of someone else asking me to do it :) I've also learned that real friends would totally understand and never expect us to do more than we tell them we are able to do. It takes a caring friend to understand and a caring friend is a real friend :) Although no one can understand what we go through unless they are going through something similar.

I have gotten better at saying No, but no one treats me nice when I use it. I guess I use it sparingly. I used it last night b/c I was getting out of the shower and my girls bombarded me with wanting to do something. I never get a good response when I say no. My girls throw a fit, my mother throws a fit, and my husband says he doesn't mind helping, but when I ask for help I get the eye roll or I will do it when I feel like it, which means he won't do it, b/c he refuses to do it right when I ask, which means he will wait and then forget.

Leo, It looks like everyone is dealing with so many doctor appointments lately. I will be too. Great therapy advice, now if the world would agree with our use of it. :-)

Angela, I was worried it would all catch up with you. I saw you wanted to clean the bathroom last night. Please pace more and don't be so hard on yourself. I'm glad you had another good dinner last night. I hope your pain eases up.

Kel, I believe what you said does make sense. We don't want to be thought less of or in my case useless. I'm glad Sparty is ahead of schedule. I hope you don't overdo it this weekend. There are some things we simply can't say no too. I still have to be a mother and put my kids first, most of the time.

Hi Lisa and CoutryGal, I'm glad you both are on check-in today.

The battle of BCBS continues. Addison went to school today b/c I made an arrangement with the school. If BCBS doesn't approve her or backdate it to include August 23rd forward, I will pay private pay at $125 a day. I better hear something from the insurance company today. Even if it's a denial, I need to know if I will be enrolling her in the public school system. This is ridiculous! My pain is so high and the nerve pain is a killer. The burning aching weakness of my feet/legs/arms is all I can handle sometimes.

Everyone rest and say NO.

Hi guys. I'm wore to a frazzle and in pain. I've never watched 2 kids for this many days since I had fibro. I am exhausted. I love my grandkids. I am just so tired. They found a babysitter, by the way. So I won't be back next week. I don't think I could make it through anyway.

I will try and respond to everyone during nap time this afternoon. I love seeing the new people here and of course staying in contact with old friends.

Good Morning to one and all! I was having delusions of gardening yesterday which got cancelled. I said "no", went for a swim and ran a couple of quick errands instead. I learned to say "no" and mean it regardless of the reception early on in this process. I'm stubborn so it was a pretty natural progression lol. I find it better to say "no" and not explain as sometimes explanations can lead to the other party trying to use that information to guilt trip, manipulate etc. Say "no", plug your ears and sing la-la-la.

I woke up late today and feeling like a dull pencil. We are supposed to have storms later today and some of them could be severe. I'd like to finally get to the movies today but not so sure that is a good idea. I'll probably stay home and find something to watch on Netflix etc.

Leo - I hope that you can work your way through your upcoming appointments without a hitch. You've had to put off a lot of stuff for quite a while. It is time to take care of you!

I have to write a letter to one of my neighbors again. There has been a change in the household hierarchy as the husband has, for good reason, been given the boot. There is a tree on the property line which is rotten and I have already trimmed it back as far as I can. Nonetheless, it is still a threat to my garage, fence, shed and pool. I have sent a letter in the past to him but now figure to cover myself legally she has to be notified too. I really hate this. Why do I have neighbors on both sides of me who apparently embrace obviously rotten trees? Do the right thing and get them topped and/or removed instead of probably losing your homeowners coverage for ignoring the situation. Here endth the rant....

AngelaJo - You've been on a tear for the past few days with a lot of activity. Unfortunately, we all pay for days like that big time. Learning to pace is pretty important. I hope that you feel better as the day progresses. Take care of yourself.

TwinMom - What the *bleep* is wrong with BCBS that you have to pay out of pocket so Addison can go to school!! That is outrageous especially since up until now, they've paid for it no problem. I really hope that you don't have to uproot her and send her back to the other school. I'm sorry that your pain levels are so high today. Sending you hugs and peaceful vibes.

Lbg1072- Good Morning and I hope that you have a good day!

Countrygal - Glad to see you on check in. Have a great day!

Kel - Glad as always to see you! I hope you are not going to go crazy this weekend and send yourself down the FFF road again. I hope that you and Sparty have a fun time after work. Take care.

Ida- I don't know how the heck you have managed taking care of two little kids all week. I would have laid down on the floor after day one and just cried. I hope that your nap helps and that you feel a bit better. Kudos to you for even attempting to babysit that long in the first place.

Have to get that letter written and to the post office. Shout out to Blue, Sonya and Bobbii. Bear, I now you are lurking out there somewhere. Everyone hang tough - it is almost Friday!

Just a few moments....I am just so exhausted. Baby boy is sleeping at the moment. I said "no" to 4 yr old, and have a Netflix movie on for her. I just can't do it. I felt guilty for about 2 seconds.

We did go on a walk, and my shins and knees are killing me. But I wanted to wear them out. I wore myself out instead, I think. Hubby wants to go to an outdoor concert tonight. The night air does nothing good for my fibro. But I'm going to go. Hubby rarely comes up with ideas for going out. He would be so hurt if I didn't go with the family.

One more day of babysitting. Then the Brewers game in the evening. We are going home on Saturday and then I'm going to collapse.

Take care.

ida, Hang in there I really feel for you. I hate doing things that I know are going to make me hurt more. I know what you mean about not wanting to let your husband down. That's why I went to his convention a few weeks back and walked a lot. I hope tonight is not as bad as you think and you get so much time to rest next week!

Fantod, Thanks for your support, I am shocked how these idiots run things. I did finally get a time for the doctors to discuss Addison with BCBS at 2:30 today. The outpatient coordinator is supposed to call me as soon as she knows something today. Fingers crossed, prayers said. I hope the tree comes down, but that does cost a lot of money and since she is going through a divorce I bet she doesn't do anything about it. I know how you feel though. We live in tree country in our neighborhood and there are a lot of old trees. We have spent $1000 just to have branches cut off. I can't imagine how much it would cost to cut it down. Yikes. I like the way you say No, I will have to try plugging my ears and singing la-la-la and see my families expression. Something tells me my girls will use it against me. haha. I hope you enjoy the day even if you can't go to the movies. We are supposed to get rain here too, I think starting tonight with a chance every day for the next week.

Shout out to BBmom, Blue, Bobbii, Sonya, bear...I know there are more, I'm sorry if I missed you.

Aloha!

Leo, you are cracking me up today with this exercise. I know it's meant to be serious, though. But I can't help but laugh because it's right on point. You're totally right that other people have no problem blowing you off, canceling, or delaying for another time. Or just saying NO to you. So why can't WE?

My husband used to be a "crastinator". But he's gotten so good at it, he's now a PROcrastinator. If I ever ask him to help me do something, his usual response is, "Yeah, maybe later." Or "Not now, I'm busy..." (doing nothing important). So chances are, he never gets around to it. I sometimes envy this behavior but have too much dignity. By the time he comes asking, "What did you need help with?" I've already struggled the task on my own and finished hours ago. For example, yesterday when he came home from work all I wanted to do was show him a really cool discovery in the yard (which was a fruit tree) as I was leaving out to acupuncture. We started walking down the hallway, but then he said, "Hold on... you can show me after I move the cat tree and set up the cat litter in the new catio..... (staring at me) Are you going to help me with this?" Me: (paused) "Um.... never mind then. I'm leaving for acupuncture. Bye." (Husband running after me outside) "Wait, you're going somewhere? What did you want to show me?" (facepalm)

Kel, You're absolutely right about that. Plus, I don't want people to pity me, think I'm some weakling, gossip, judge, suggest miracle cures, etc.

Thanks for all the shout-outs, everyone! You're such a nice group of people. :)

Yesterday my acupuncturist stuck one in my "happy spot" on my head to treat nightmares. At 1st I thought maybe it was some hokey stuff. But I didn't have any bad dreams last night!! Whoohoo!

I feel like just taking a day off, though, and treating myself to something nice. But I have horse therapy and then later PTSD therapy (booo). I'm tired of all these appts. I accidentally missed one yesterday when busy looking up information and making calls on mom stuff. Time slipped by and the appt totally slipped my mind. I should have double checked my schedule or set an alarm.

Back in a little....

Hi all! I love the therapy however, I am not too good at it. I have gotten better at not volunteering for things. But generally when asked I do what people ask. For instance, we are taking the camper up to the race tonight and I am staying up there. However, the neighbor just asked me to run him to a place 45 min away and he will buy us dinner. I cannot say no to him as he is like a dad and always helps us out. So...

Leo, sorry you had a late start to the day, but yay for sleep. I know looking at the calendar can be daunting. Hopefully it isn't as bad as it looks.

Angela, try to take it easy. You are a lot like me in the fact that when you feel better, you get things done, then pay for it later.

Kel, you make me laugh. I have to agree with you on the probable reason I don't say no more often. Glad pt. #1 is doing well. Hopefully pt. #2 doesn't do too much this weekend.

Lisa and Country - nice to see ya here. I hope you learn to say no soon.

Twin, I am so so sorry you are dealing with the additional stress of BCBS. Hopefully the doc will get them on the right page today. I will keep my fingers crossed. Did you quit taking MTX? Is that why your nerve pain seems worse?

Ida, oh to be little again with all of that energy. Sorry the walk wore you out instead of the kiddos. I am pretty sure I would be a pile after one day. I am glad they have a sitter and next week you can be home to relax in your recliner.

Fantod, oh I hate confronting neighbors. I talk to the one, he is like my dad, but the other side I am just cordial to. They stop over when we are outside. The ones across the street, well we don't speak after I had it out with the husband for mowing prior to 7am on the weekends. The wife is a nosy bitty too. Anyways, I hope you can get to the garden today. I am seriously just taking the weed wacker to mine. Have a good day.

I think I have hit everyone. I need to get food prepped for the weekend. I have found this is easier than cooking it all at the campsite, since we have limited water. We are having ziti, pulled pork and chicken bbq for our main meal. Cereal or eggs for bfast.

Take care all. I will try to check in these next few days if I have service.

Hi BBmom, I'm glad you made it on today. I'm still on MTX for now, and the doc keeps telling me it will start helping with the nerve pain, it's gotten worse in August. I'm not sure if it's weather related or what's going on. I just know extra burning and pain, as if there wasn't enough before. I don't blame you for taking your neighbor, especially if you feel that way about him. It does feel good to help others sometimes. If they deserve it! I hope you have a great weekend!

Hi Twin. Sorry you are dealing with the extra burning on top of the symptoms from MTX. You just need to catch a break, soon. Okay, I am off to take the neighbor. Hopefully by the time I get that done hubby will be off shift and have the camper ready. Once it is parked I see a Michelob Ultra in my future! LOL

Oh Angela, I read yesterday you did all those chores and then cooked a lot. I'm sorry you're in so much pain now. Healing prayers it calms down and you can get some rest....

Lgb, the closest to red head I've ever gone was the few times I dyed my hair red white and blue for the 4th.

CountryGal, I'm glad those years are over for you and hope they don't ever come back. You are so right, nobody really understands unless they have walked a similar road.

Twin, I would *like* to think I've gotten better at saying no. Some days I pat myself on the back for it, and other days I'm paying for whatever I've done. OMG, I can't believe you had to agree to pay out of pocket! That BCBS is just rotten. I hope they find who is responsible for the mess and fire them. Extra prayers going up this gets sorted out!

Wow, Ida, just take care of yourself. I'm glad they found a baby sitter. Whatever happened to the days when you could pay a few teens $10? My mom said everyone has to be certified in childcare now.

Fantod, your neighbors amaze me with their rotten tree collection. Smh. Keeping my fingers crossed all goes well and they remove them pronto without much confrontation. I remember these issues at the HOA meetings being a constant topic (I was recording secretary -hated that "job").

Bbmom, when people ask me to drive them somewhere I usually respond with a "Hm, let me check my husband's schedule and I'll let you know what he says..." lol. Driving is one of those things that trigger back spasms for me. I hope your friend gets you an all you can eat buffet. Pulled pork and BBQ chicken sounds yum. I like that you have figured out to bring yummy food to the camp site. Hope everything goes well for you.

Enjoy saying NO, everyone!