Fibromyalgia Support Group
You're not alone in your pain. Fibromyalgia is a condition that can be difficult to diagnose and manage. If you're trying to cope with pain throughout your body, sleep problems, general fatigue, or other common fibromyalgia symptoms, you're in the right place. The community is here for you to talk about therapies and share your challenges.
I've been friends with this guy for about a year, maybe more. Recently we started hanging out a lot more (1-2x a week), starting the month of Aug. And we just do simple things like see a movie, eat lunch, or go to the beach. He is a chronic pain patient (from a back injury) so sometimes all we do is meet up at the doctor's office. He knows I have fibro, BUT he doesn't know ALL the details that entail the sufferings of fibro, only seems to know some basics (ex: wide spread pain, headaches, some fatigue).
here's some of the problems i'm running into:
- he doesn't know anything about brain fog.....
every time we hang out, he tells me these stories about hims self that go on and on and on and on..... I"m lost after a few mins already and all I end up hearing is "Blah bla blah..." then I don't even know what the hell he's talkin about anymore and completely forget the story.
How do I tell him about brain fog with out pissing him off??
- he doesn't understand the "I am NOT a morning person"
and keeps trying to make early morning plans with me! he told me that if i'm not awake, he'll just carry me down to the car!! WTF! i've tried explaining to him with fibro, it doesn't work like that!
How do I explain that mornings aren't good for me so that he CAN understand??
- one last thing, he has been telling everybody that because HE has chronic pain (w/ his back) that he understand MY pain. ....??
here's some of the problems i'm running into:
- he doesn't know anything about brain fog.....
every time we hang out, he tells me these stories about hims self that go on and on and on and on..... I"m lost after a few mins already and all I end up hearing is "Blah bla blah..." then I don't even know what the hell he's talkin about anymore and completely forget the story.
How do I tell him about brain fog with out pissing him off??
- he doesn't understand the "I am NOT a morning person"
and keeps trying to make early morning plans with me! he told me that if i'm not awake, he'll just carry me down to the car!! WTF! i've tried explaining to him with fibro, it doesn't work like that!
How do I explain that mornings aren't good for me so that he CAN understand??
- one last thing, he has been telling everybody that because HE has chronic pain (w/ his back) that he understand MY pain. ....??
Could you get him to join DS, then steer him into here ? ......... it might help him understand a bit better when he sees what we all go through ................... failing that hunny I would be looking at him real hard to see if he is future potential long term relationship material
myheart, brain fog = fibro fog = memory issues, confusion, short attention span, trouble thinking straight, can't find the right words, can't process words right, losing things, putting things in the wrong places, and the list goes on.
so yeah, when he talks on and on, i feel like there's just noise goin off at me.
about the afternoon suggestion, i tried that, but then he wanted to go in the late afternoon / early evening when my pain starts to shoot way up. he doesn't get it that i only have several hours right in the middle of the day to go and do something (and that's if i'm feeling ok that day). so much for him telling people he understands my pain!
he's already told me that he doesn't want to lose me as a friend. so i'm thinking i should at least TRY to make him understand this Fm crap...*sigh*. mom's gonna help me go to the book store and get a book on fibro for him. back when SHE couldn't understand what i was going through, i flipped out at her and told her to go read some books, so she did. it made a huge difference.
WAIT, should i just try the same strategy with him??
and Peace, how much for YOUR book?
thanks for everyone's encouragement here! y'all rock!
I agree. He sounds like he's looking for a sounding board and he needs to be told to shut up. That being together in total silence can be very sexy. Try that one.