Family Issues Support Group

Family issues is a huge range that go from minor conflict to major misbehaviour and even abuse on the part of individual members of the family occur. Whether you feel you are in a dysfunctional family or you're dealing with a very specific issue, this is the place to talk about it and find others who might be going through the same thing.

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/ Family Issues Support Group

It’s been awhile….

Shamrock424
Shamrock424

Hello! It's been a long time since I've been on DS. I'm widowed and have 3 grown children, two boys and a girl. They each have 2 children. My challenge is my daughter and one granddaughter. My daughter and I have had conflict since she was 13. She is now 44 and her daughter is 16. Neither one is speaking to me because my daughter kicked her oldest daughter (also my granddaughter) out of the house and I took her into my home. She is 19 and I would not allow her to be homeless. She stayed with me for 5 months and now has her own apartment and is doing very well. I was very close to both the girls but all of a sudden now, the younger granddaughter says to me "you are no longer my grandmother and I want nothing to do with you". My daughter is very controlling and thinks she can tell me what to do and if I choose differently, she gets very angry. She has abused me financially and emotionally for years since her father passed away. So I'm okay with her not speaking to me but now she's pulled my granddaughter away and it's breaking my heart. Most of my family (my other grandchildren and my two sons) are either staying neutral or on my side. I hate to say that because there should not be sides. Anyway, thank you for listening. I just need another forum to voice out my feelings! 

Community Leaderbobinmaine
bobinmaine
I just can't imagine what you are going through....I don't know if you have a connection to a God but if it were me, I would just put it in the Hands of God and forget about it to allow Him to do for me what I cannot do for myself. I have seen so many miracles when I put my life into the Hands of a Power greater then myself. It works every time.....

God Bless
Shamrock424
Shamrock424
Thank you for responding. I do believe in God and pray for my daughter and granddaughter everyday. I believe in the Blessed Mother and pray for her to help me be a better mother everyday. I know this will pass. Hopefully sooner than later.
hasty_05
hasty_05
This is called estrangement and has become an epidemic in the USA. Whether or not your daughter becomes a nicer person or stops being abusive to you, there is healing. I really like the book, Done with the Crying by McGregor. I’ll add the link to the slow family estrangement group on here. FB has a lot of groups for estranged parents- some good & some angry and blaming.
hasty_05
hasty_05
https://www.dailystrength.org/group/parents-of-estranged-adult-children
Shamrock424
Shamrock424
Thank you so much! I have a little trouble navigating in DS and didn’t know there was a group already formed on this topic. I guess it is more common than I thought. Thank you again.
hasty_05
hasty_05
Yes, Shamrock, estrangement is a huge problem in the USA and UK. One research found about 27% in the USA and 25% in the UK of people answering their questions had estranged from a family member in the past. Long ago, say before 2012 or so, DS had many active parental estrangement forums. When DS changed in the past, some of the parents created their own website, it was called walk away or something like that or maybe parents walking away. I used to come here and read at the beginning of what became my family estrangements and read the wise advice. Then all the groups went to Facebook it seems. Some of the FB pages for estranged parents are good, positive, healthy but many are bitter, angry, blaming, people really crying out for mental health help but not being directed there. Anyway, take care of yourself.
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