Family Issues Support Group
Family issues is a huge range that go from minor conflict to major misbehaviour and even abuse on the part of individual members of the family occur. Whether you feel you are in a dysfunctional family or you're dealing with a very specific issue, this is the place to talk about it and find others who might be going through the same thing.
I am new to this site and have no idea where to start, so I figured id just start here, with whats going on right now.
I am 25 and i am having (what feels like) a major life crisis. my boyfriend and i have been together for 9 year. he has been faithful, but i haven't been. i have cheated on him 3 times. he knows about them, as i have recently come clean about everything i have kept from him. i have hurt him tremendously. for some reason unbeknownst to me, he has decided to give me yet another chance. i know in my heart of hearts that i am not the same person i was. before, i lied and cheated without batting an eye. and it seems like its all hitting me in the chest at once. he has not forgiven me, and openly admits that. so whenever we get into a fight, he is very quick to anger and throws everything i have ever done to him, up in my face. he calls me all sorts of names and literally makes me feel worthless. this is the person who, when hes not mad at me, tells me that he loves me and only wants to be with me and never wants to be in another relationship with another woman EVER if we don't work out. that i am hs only one.i feel like complete shit for what ive done to him and the lies i have told. he tells me that it doesn't matter how many times i say im sorry and that im never going to cheat again, b/c i have said that to him in the past, and then cheated again. so my words (even though its all i have) are pointless and empty. i messed up the relationship by myself by cheating, so he says i have to fix it by myself. he feels like he doesn't need to do anything, bc hes not the one who messed it up. i have no friends, bc i cant be trusted in a relationship that ive cheated so many times. i cant talk to any of my family, bc they are either not s psrt of my life like i would like, or i don't feel comfortablel talking to them. and if i do talk to anyone, they lose a little respect for my bf bc they are hearing my one-sided story.
on top of feeling worthless and alone, i have recently lost my faith in religion. before, i was able to be comforted when i prayed. but i don't even have that. i don't know what i consider myself really, but i used to be a Christian. my bf is an atheist. i have been able to maintain my faith, up until about a year ago. i have read the works of and listen a lot to some of the worlds most predominate atheists, and their logic and science make me feel like a fool that i believed in a god for 24 years or so of my life. no one outside of my counselor knows that ive given up religion.
now...knowing that thers not a god (or leaning very heavily towards the fact) means theres no heaven. this is another hard pill for me to swallow. my entire life ive thought my loved ones went there when they died. more significantly, i had an abortion at a very young age, and was able to find at least a little comfort knowing that my baby was in heaven with jesus. when i get to thinking about it, or get into a fight with my bf, i start to feel like im here for no reason. whats the point to life, in a sense. its damn near impossible to shake that feeling, and that, on top of everything else, i start to doubt the reason for even going on.
i realy don't know what to do, and have no one to talk to, so i am kinda hoping this website can help.
I am 25 and i am having (what feels like) a major life crisis. my boyfriend and i have been together for 9 year. he has been faithful, but i haven't been. i have cheated on him 3 times. he knows about them, as i have recently come clean about everything i have kept from him. i have hurt him tremendously. for some reason unbeknownst to me, he has decided to give me yet another chance. i know in my heart of hearts that i am not the same person i was. before, i lied and cheated without batting an eye. and it seems like its all hitting me in the chest at once. he has not forgiven me, and openly admits that. so whenever we get into a fight, he is very quick to anger and throws everything i have ever done to him, up in my face. he calls me all sorts of names and literally makes me feel worthless. this is the person who, when hes not mad at me, tells me that he loves me and only wants to be with me and never wants to be in another relationship with another woman EVER if we don't work out. that i am hs only one.i feel like complete shit for what ive done to him and the lies i have told. he tells me that it doesn't matter how many times i say im sorry and that im never going to cheat again, b/c i have said that to him in the past, and then cheated again. so my words (even though its all i have) are pointless and empty. i messed up the relationship by myself by cheating, so he says i have to fix it by myself. he feels like he doesn't need to do anything, bc hes not the one who messed it up. i have no friends, bc i cant be trusted in a relationship that ive cheated so many times. i cant talk to any of my family, bc they are either not s psrt of my life like i would like, or i don't feel comfortablel talking to them. and if i do talk to anyone, they lose a little respect for my bf bc they are hearing my one-sided story.
on top of feeling worthless and alone, i have recently lost my faith in religion. before, i was able to be comforted when i prayed. but i don't even have that. i don't know what i consider myself really, but i used to be a Christian. my bf is an atheist. i have been able to maintain my faith, up until about a year ago. i have read the works of and listen a lot to some of the worlds most predominate atheists, and their logic and science make me feel like a fool that i believed in a god for 24 years or so of my life. no one outside of my counselor knows that ive given up religion.
now...knowing that thers not a god (or leaning very heavily towards the fact) means theres no heaven. this is another hard pill for me to swallow. my entire life ive thought my loved ones went there when they died. more significantly, i had an abortion at a very young age, and was able to find at least a little comfort knowing that my baby was in heaven with jesus. when i get to thinking about it, or get into a fight with my bf, i start to feel like im here for no reason. whats the point to life, in a sense. its damn near impossible to shake that feeling, and that, on top of everything else, i start to doubt the reason for even going on.
i realy don't know what to do, and have no one to talk to, so i am kinda hoping this website can help.
If you have arguments, fights, this would have a negative effect on the children, the environment will be unhealthy, so think of them first, your responsibility as a mom, then your relationship.
You needed to be with someone else because there is lacking in your relationship, also you have low self-esteeme, ,and yes being abuse as a child affects your ability to cope with an abusive man.
Domination, manipulation, control, is not right between 2 people that should share love, compassion, understanding and life together.
There is something that you miss, and makes you yearn to make you feel whole.
Think carefully and do what is best for you and children, look up ''narcissistic behaviour'' and see if it makes sense.
As for your faith , it is your choice,you are going through a crises, and ''THE LORD'' never said that he was born at Christmas, that is religion not faith.
Hope you find your way and do whats right, you already did by confessing the truth, love ***
Warm gentle hugs
Science and faith in God are not incompatible...
If you've cheated on your BF so much, maybe it's time to leave him. Perhaps he's why you don't have a relationship with God any more and you need to leave one to reclaim the other???
the way I see it is this: I am not the same person I used to be. People CAN change. I don't really know much more beyond that though, unfortunately.
its not always all bad either, I guess the bad can over shadow the good. idk.
and about leaving him, i don't know. it just doesn't seem like what i need to do. like i said ^, its nott bad all the time. just when it is, its real bad. t has a lot to do with him being the only person in my life that has been there constantly, wthout fail.
time will tell.