Families of SOs Community Group
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Let's start with the premise that you catch more flies with honey rather than with vinegar. I have no statistical evidence to show this is true, but I think we can all agree it seems to make sense intuitively, that people who act badly towards us do not get our benefit of the doubt. That we tend to look more disfavorably on they say and how they act.
Let's also start with the premise that we as families of sex offenders, and former registrants are behind the proverbial 8 ball when it comes to public perception. That even though statistics bear out that we have a lower recidivism rate, society in general assumes otherwise. That even though your child is 13 times more likely to be abused by someone they know and usually know quite well, society thinks that registrants and former registrants are the major problem that they need watch out for.
So assuming both of these premises why are we acting like this?
One commenter in the comments section said:
"so.. ruin a victims life by doing something that will probably effect every decision they make for the rest of their lives and the offenders think they can go on living their lives unfettered? hell no, you better wear that scarlet letter forever. i have no sympathy for sex offenders."
This was met by our side saying:
"Who gives a damn what you think? You are part of the problem."
And
"F you. Get the hell out of the U.S."
We will never win the battle of public perception with people such as this responding this way.
Let's also start with the premise that we as families of sex offenders, and former registrants are behind the proverbial 8 ball when it comes to public perception. That even though statistics bear out that we have a lower recidivism rate, society in general assumes otherwise. That even though your child is 13 times more likely to be abused by someone they know and usually know quite well, society thinks that registrants and former registrants are the major problem that they need watch out for.
So assuming both of these premises why are we acting like this?
One commenter in the comments section said:
"so.. ruin a victims life by doing something that will probably effect every decision they make for the rest of their lives and the offenders think they can go on living their lives unfettered? hell no, you better wear that scarlet letter forever. i have no sympathy for sex offenders."
This was met by our side saying:
"Who gives a damn what you think? You are part of the problem."
And
"F you. Get the hell out of the U.S."
We will never win the battle of public perception with people such as this responding this way.
Independent,
Yes, it is about Valerie and bullies like her. Notice that she rarely goes after anyone who gets right back in her 'Grill'? Bullies don't know how to handle anyone who's more aggressive than they are.
True story.
The first couple months of my freshman year I was bullied by a senior until I had enough one day and he found himself in a dumpster behind the gym. After that, if he saw me in the hall, he just went the other way..
This is my last post on this subject. I respect your views on how to respond to these people, but please don't tell me my way is 'unacceptable'. You have your way, I have mine.
As far as standing up to Val -- LOL! Derek has done that for years now, neither one is backing down I think they were cut from the same cloth, both as stubborn as the other. So Val is not stepping down and neither is Derek. And I laugh at your insinuation if you stand up to Val it will make her be pquiet. She could be long since passed on and I think her mouth will still keep on moving complaining about sex offenders.
oh, by the way, i guess i am now famous? she has taken note of a couple of posts i did on few articles and replied. she is also now a 'follower' of mine. : )
Valerie attacks people she doesn't understand. And quite frankly she doesn't get the wives of RSOs on this board. She is so caught up in her thinking that all offenders reoffend that she is baffled by you ladies. She doesn't see the grace and understanding you bring as anything other than condoning sex crimes, which couldn't be farther from the truth. In fact by marrying RSOs and staying married you actually lower their actuarial score of reoffending on the static-99. Which is irony at its finest right there. But trying to tell that to Val is like trying to explain calculus to a 5th grader.
At the same point i want to make it clear I believe Val believes in what she is doing. She is a typical consumer of media and gets the wrong picture from our "if it bleeds it leads" media mentality. She said in our debate that she didn't understand how anecdotal evidence isn't important, she reads it everyday! Wait for it, because it's anecdotal! It is not supported by quantitative data. The media is showing us the worst of the worst!
I don't blame people for responding to her venom with venom. I think it's s lot more satisfying not to and I think it gives us a better reputation. However, this post was not judging people for what they say to Val or other Anti's like her. What I'm saying is we can't speak to the general public like that.