I had on a Christian t shirt once and had to go into the ladies room to turn my shirt inside out. However, someone else got in wearing a shirt that was covered with skull bones!

We all have stories about a screwed up and flawed system. I hear your pain and feel it along with you.
Hers one for ya.
Im 67 and disabled. The State of NJ has provide me with an HP placard. In order to get that placard I had to have my Dr sign it. In one facility, I must get pre-approved, by that doc facility, before I can park in the HP parking spaces at the prison. I must have yet another signed note from my doctor.
Also, I must register my leg brace and walker prior to visitation to get approval for them under the REQUEST FOR A REASONABLE ACCOMMODATION requirement. Sad to say but when I do use my walker they dont even check it for contraband. Hell, I could hide drugs in my false teeth. Do I register them too ??

What Im saying is....it all depends on what Lieut is on duty, What mood he's or the guards are in etc.

It's all BS to me. Job protection. Control... not just over the inmates either.

I agree about the control thing. But it is what it is. I just want to go see my son and kiss him and hug him. If I have to follow the rules that is what I will do. I follow rules everywhere else so this won't bother me. Thanks for all of your tips on the dress code everyone. I'm counting down the days til I see my son and I am at on 8 days from now. I'm so excited that I'm about to cry. It's bittersweet tears because once I see him I'll have to wait another month or two because it's so far but at least we write and talk with each other. ;-)

It's been 3 months and counting. I have no idea when or if I will see my son again. He is currently in Montana, I live in New York State. We have no idea how long he will be there, or where he will end up being housed. The judge here did request that he be placed as close to his support system (me) as possible, but who knows. So for now we write letters and talk on the phone at least every couple of days.
Enjoy your time with your son, I am very happy for you both.

Oh Kitty, I am so sorry. Don't stop pushing to get him to come closer to you. I just think it is horrible that my son can't be closer to me, but reading how far your son is from you must really be hard for you. This will be my first visit seeing my son in nine months and we only have two hours to be with him. You don't get to visit but once a month. I will take it though. Good luck getting your son closer though.

I was feeling bad that I haven't seen my son in 3 months, makes it worse that hes my youngest. But when I saw your post, it's been 9 months for you, I realized 3 months is not that bad. He is only in Montana because they have him indicted on CP charges. He has already started serving a 10 year sentence under a federal plea bargain here in NY State. There are a few federal facilities in my state, but they are at least 6 hours away. I'm hoping they decide to send him to PA, or Ohio. Either of those would be about 3 or 4 hours (I think). I know the one in Ohio is about a 3 hour drive.
My dad used to say that no matter how bad you think you have it, there is always someone worse off than you. Sometimes It helps me put things in perspective when I read a post like this one. I wish your son could be closer to you. I also wish you could visit more than once a month. But you are right, we take what we can get.

Kitty, I am so sorry that you have to go through this but ya know, it hurts us no matter what. My son is the oldest, although has a mind of a 12 year old. Its just sad that they are using these prisons as mental wards. When I speak with my son, I can hear he is maturing in his voice. He no longer has the voice of a teen. He is going to be 24 this year and his voice has just changed within the last five months. It all hurts whether they are our youngest or oldest. Kitty, we will get through this and I am thankful for all of you hear because when I really need someone to understand my deepest hurt, it is only here that I feel comforted. I know my family is behind my son, but they don't know the hurt that I feel deep down inside of not having my son with me. They think they know, but unless you go through it yourself, you don't know. But thanks to you all giving your shoulders, it helps me to get through my hurt day by day. :-)

heartbroken, we are all in the same boat. I am sorry that you have to go through this. I agree, just knowing they are where they are is heartbreaking. Our journey has just begun and already I don't know what I would have done without all of you. My husband tries to be supportive, but I really can't talk to him like I can you guys.I would have been a basket case a long time ago, if not for the understanding and support from all of you.
You got 6 days left. I'm getting excited for you.

Five days to go and counting!!!!!

hey heartbroken, i didn't read all the comments so i don't if this was already mentioned but where my son was at we could bring $20 but it could not be a $20. A $20 bill is considered contraband and they actually told me i was holding contraband. It can be a combination to equal $20 but not a $20 bill. One man showed up with a $20 bill for his first visit and of course no one gave him change because then we wouldn't have money for our loved one so he actually ran to his car and took off down the road somewhere to get change. Don't know the rules on where you are going so just warning you.

Thanks bsmom14! That is something good to know because we all know that they just like to keep us guessing. I will make sure that I have change in ones and fives! Thanks so much for everything everyone! Four days and counting! :-)

I am so happy for you. I wish I could see my son.

Thanks you deenamom. I just called back to see if there is a color that we cannot wear and they don't have restrictions on colors. That is a good thing. No muscle shirts or anything like that but I get to wear my tennis shoes and I plan on it because if I have to take my shoes off at least I will have my socks on. I am really starting to get excited!!! Two more days!!!!

The money thing is so funny - how it varies from state to state. We can't have any paper money at all - only change. No more than $25 in a clear plastic zipper bag.

Enjoy your visit - just one more day now!

Can't you ask for a special visit. My boyfriend is about 5 1/2 hours away and sometimes I ask him to request the 2 days. You have to ask in advance and that is about 2 weeks before. This is PA though. Can you visit during the week and do a Sun/Mon type of thing?