I personally think it is a wise move to have the two seperate forums. One for support and one for activism.

Red - why can't this be both? It isn't like whatever "activism" is happening here is real activism. It is purely conversation - about how we can work together to change these draconian laws. And as many have expressed - that IS therapeutic and supportive!

oneofthem:I agree that sometimes you have to fight.. but you can go a little overboard at times and that bothers some people.
Terry: I agree . I don't want to own a group. I'd rather be part of one. I thought we were getting kicked off. There seems to be a problem with activism in this group. I understand, the owners don't want that kind of thing going on here.. or was I mistaken?

I think the real issue isn't with "activism" per se. It is more about respecting each other - something that Red and I were doing little of yesterday. I admit I should have handled the situation differently and will do better in the future.

When Red made the hot air comments I should have simply encouraged further discussion rather than resorting to a Pee-wee Herman method of debate (I know you are, but what am I? I know you are, but what am I?) :)

it is therapeutic and supportive to a point... but there comes a point in time when it crosses the line at being a support group then vs an activist group. While many have progressed through their harder times, there are some that are at the beginning of their journey and if they start seeing a lot of activist stuff they may be less likely to express their disgust, hurt, repulsion and anger that they feel because of the tone of the activist type posts. A poster on here said it already, that they were feeling more like our opposition until they were able to vent learn and grieve for the life they knew that has now been lost/changed forever by the arrest of their loved one. Support is support for those that were real RSO haters and Men haters... In fact there is one person on here I that I know for a fact used to be a victim's advocate ONLY due to her own experiences and through this group and her own learning she has actually found that her thinking about ALL sex offenders was not exactly accurate... Had she come here and only read about how to change laws and not about those that are both activists but also human and feel all the things she was feeling. She might have never stayed, never changed her thinking and she may not have become an advocate for change that she is now.

Okay then - I go grudgingly, but I'll go - since the gauntlet has been laid down. I thought the debate going on in some of these threads was pretty healthy to everyone in this situation. I guess that feeling isn't shared.

Actually - I think I'll just get back away from this as I have since mid-2007. There is just too much drama, and it seems to be in every group. Someone always has some power trip that overrides the value of any group that is formed.

SAD!

On my way out the door though I gotta say, this sucks. I was actually enjoying the conversation and felt others were as well.

I agree with the drama Terry.. One reason why I try to keep space between me and being a member of a group. Seems rules and restrictions start popping up that some feel is unfair to part of the community. . kindof like what our government is doing to our sons, husbands and selves.. but that's activism. . I guess that's just part of who I am.
So... that means we're not supposed to post that stuff here? ok.. I guess I can find other things to do for a while as well. This stuff starts taking away from my time to actually do real things in the real world.
A step back is sometimes good.

What is with the remarks? "I guess the feeling isn't shared" Are we in High School?

You have been in this a LONG TIME Terry, what about the spouse of someone that was arrested a couple of months ago, they are looking for a support group, which means there will be people on here that won't agree with all activist type thinking right away. They will be angry, hurt, betrayed and seeking validation of those feelings, if the first thing they see when they hit the main page is 10 posts about changing laws, do you think they will look further for 'support'? I know I probably wouldn't.

I know to some it seems like these things should go hand in hand but when you look at how support groups functions in 'in-person' settings, is advocacy in that subject discussed in those sessions? No, it is about the subject and the feelings of those in the group about that subject. They don't discuss how to change things they discuss how they feel... I understand the convenience of having both in one place for folks, especially if they have gotten to the acceptance part of their process, but for those that just aren't there yet it isn't fair to them to force them into acceptance or lose them completely because the forum couldn't keep it separate, or they see things like what happened yesterday happen. That is not what a support group is supposed to be about.

The activist group is an excellent idea so that those that want to discuss hardcore about advocating for change and lobbying and things like that can discuss it in full. Here it will be touched on but it shouldn't dominate the board.

Terry you have been good all day long so far, and now again with the snide remarks and pot shots at the moderation here. This is your final warning.

I'm joining your group. I hope you don't ask me to leave if I post something that's not activism. Maybe you'll put me on a list. I have days when I need emotional support and others when I'm feeling strong and want to do my part to change the laws that we are victims of. That's the problem with us humans, we're so damn unruly.

I'm not leaving here though because regardless of what the decider thinks, he/she can't possibly know that what we do isn't good for some.

And the decider might want to think about those who need hope, and to be part of the solution. On my strong days I don't need sympathy, on my bad days, I still need to know what I can do to be part of the solution.

Maybe, just maybe, without dictatorship everyone will get what they need. Peace

Yeah I guess I shoulda said: I'm joining the activist group

Nothing wrong with being a member of both groups....

I think we need both. I came to this group for support as a wife of an offender in prison. I could never have made it through the holidays without this group! But I think I would have been scared away had all the drama been here like it is today back in December. Now that I have a year under my belt, I am ready to move on to the next step and kick some legislature ass! But I still have some moments where I just need someone to say it's ok, we are all going through tough times, and remind me that I will get through this!