Families & Friends Of Addicts Support Group
Addiction affects more than just the individual. This community is dedicated to the families and friends of individuals suffering from any form of addiction. Mental health professionals are increasingly considering alcoholism and addiction as diseases that flourish in and are enabled by family systems. Family members react to the addicted person with particular behavioral...
First, some background. My husband is bipolar and takes medication for it. He also has PTSD from being sexually abused as a child and from his time in prison, the latter being why is hasn't worked im six years.
He drinks lots of beer each day. If he could, he could drink a six-pack in a day easy, though I have seen him drink as much as eight. Yet, while he admits that he is alcohol-dependent at the same time he doesn't think it is a problem because he does not get drunk.
As for drugs, he is prescribed Gabapentin for anxiety, but he is out early each month because he takes more than prescribed. I think he gets a 90-day prescription. If I'm right, he is out in 3 weeks. But even if it is 30-days he is out a week and a half early. Yet, while he admits that he takes too many he doesn't think it is a problem since he isn't strung out like a junkie.
Any tips?
I am so sorry you are going through this difficult time with your husband. It is not easy trying to control their habits that is for sure. Have you thought about looking into counseling? This could possibly help with his PTSD and at the same time help combat his drinking/medication dependency. Dealing with a loved one's dependency issues can be very trying and quite frankly overwhelming, so you need some help too. Look for support groups or substance abuse counseling in your area. Getting yourself strong will help you support your husband. I am sending lots of prayers your way today. Hope you have a blessed weekend.
First and foremost, I'm sorry you have to deal with this situation. As the mom of an addict who no one in the family believed had an addiction, especially not him, I understand the frustration you feel when he feels he's not addicted.
After my son passed away from his addiction my life steered me to work with those people with a dual diagnosis of mental health & addictions. Sadly, the hardest thing for those of us who love a person with MH & addictions is to admit that we have zero control. The person needs to want to change, needs to accept the addiction and seek support and help for both his mental health and his addiction to alcohol and prescription medications.
Be a support without enabling. Show you care, express your desire for him to feel better, to be healthier. Drinking with gabapentin is worrisome. Would he consider therapy? Therapy is often the first step in helping a person understand their illnesses as well as linking with the correct medications to help, therapy groups, even healthy eating and exercise.
Counseling for him alone and the both of you can open so many doors. It can help him learn about his illness, what can help him and your relationship. . You have to learn to be strong for you. Loving a person with an addiction is consuming. It's hard to watch someone you love slowly kill themselves but it's also devastating to your own life. I would urge you to talk to a therapist as well. The one thing that won't work is ultimatums or arguments. You can't get a person with addictions to "hear" you while they are under the influence.
I'll send you love & prayers & hugs as you search for what will help. If he won't go - then you go to a therapist to help you cope.