Empty Nests Support Group
Empty nest syndrome is a general feeling of depression and loneliness that parents/other guardian relatives feel when one or more of their children leave home. Empty nest syndrome has become more prevalent in modern times, as the extended family is becoming less common than in past generations, and the elderly are left living by themselves.
It is the 4th of July and I am sad. Does anyone else feel blue on the holidays?
I have one child left at home, but he is kind of blah about everything. Not sure if it is just because his brothers are gone and it has sucked the fun out of everything for him too.
Thought my oldest was coming up tonight. He said he was, but found out he is just coming by very late to use the guest room and will be headed off bright and early with his girl. My youngest may not even see him tomorrow.
My middle son comes back from his honeymoon today, but they have promisied all the "first" holidays to be just the two of them so not coming by until Monday. Have never gone a week without seeing him before.
What does everyone else do? Start new traditions? Go out of town? Or am I the only one with the empty nest holiday blues?
I have one child left at home, but he is kind of blah about everything. Not sure if it is just because his brothers are gone and it has sucked the fun out of everything for him too.
Thought my oldest was coming up tonight. He said he was, but found out he is just coming by very late to use the guest room and will be headed off bright and early with his girl. My youngest may not even see him tomorrow.
My middle son comes back from his honeymoon today, but they have promisied all the "first" holidays to be just the two of them so not coming by until Monday. Have never gone a week without seeing him before.
What does everyone else do? Start new traditions? Go out of town? Or am I the only one with the empty nest holiday blues?
My oldest son is in Boston with his girlfriend on vacation. My youngest son is spending time with his wife's family which is always what happens on most holidays.
Are any of your friends around (the ones that make you laugh) that you could hang out with? Maybe you and your husband could do something fun. Just saying that sometimes our kids are clueless to what we're going through.
I do movie marathons on holidays. My kids love those but if they're not here, I have other friends who enjoy them with me. We do 007, Harry Potter, Boston Legal. And a pot luck along with it. Of course, we have little chats and things throughout the day and into the evening.
Other people earmark holidays for shopping, napping, organizing, deep house cleaning, volunteering...whatever it is you like to do.
I also think it's okay to tell adult children that you'd really like them to come home for a couple holidays each year. Christmas is just so important to me and I'd feel really bummed if I couldn't see my kids around that time. I get that they may need to be with their partner's family ON Christmas, but I've asked them to please make time to come home for a few days during the month of December or January and again during the summer sometime.
I think when we can be direct but flexible about our needs they're typically willing to work with us.
They want to know that we're okay but also want to have their lives. One of the greatest gifts we can give them is finding new adventures as they launch off on theirs.
That was a little hard to get used to because we live on a lake and I had always pictured them visiting us for boating and grilling, pool, etc. and at first it hurt my feelings that all of this seemed "wasted".
But we have lots of friends here and luckily she wants us down there as often as we can come. Oh, and did I mention she lives in Charleston? Not a bad place to visit! :)