Divorce after Twenty years together Community Group

I want to start something for those of us that were married for a long long time. I think that we face a little different issues than those who were dating for a few years or even married for shorter period of time. Being married for so long we have older children some have grandkids dealing with teenagers and their reaction to the divorice empty nesters dating after 40...

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/ Divorce after Twenty years together Support Group

Divorce after 24 years!

Community Leaderbobinmaine
bobinmaine
Is there hope for me finding a new relationship after so many years married? How long should I wait after the divorce is finalized before I begin dating again?
Community Leaderbobinmaine
bobinmaine
Thanks for all the tips. I am planning for a life alone for the next few years. Hoping for a decent settlement so I can get a place of my own.

So glad I joined this group
tobywinn
tobywinn
Dating is fine after divorce, IF you are whole, emotionally healthy with good sense of self esteem, and secured identity. If on the other hand, your aim of dating is to seek a person for a thrill to make you feel better, to fulfill an emotional emptiness or loneness, you are not ready. You may need some emotional tuning. Choosing the type of person to date may be motivated and based on depravity rather than from having true interest in their personality. You might do better on causal group dates. It will give you a chance to observe a person in group settings and spruce up your own social skills.
trisha9054
trisha9054
33 year marriage for me and I'm almost 5 years post divorce. I'm not looking for anyone nor expecting anyone in my life. I had two attys. tell me to stay with the ex that my chances of having another man in my life were slim. I will say what I told them. I wasn't looking for the last two husbands.

I'm having too much fun with this farm to mess that up with someone else in my life for now. If it happens that's okay too but I have no expectations of every living with anyone again.

I would imagine there is still some work for you to do with a good therapist. Just dating with no expectations might be harmless enough for now. I wish you luck on the dating scene.
jodikaye62
jodikaye62
I believe it's really important to put any romantic relationships on the back burner until you have done the work and processing to be comfortable with yourself. Being single doesn't mean being lonely--so it's important to cultivate relationships, but I believe that moving into a romantic relationship stops your healing. Certainly, after 24 years in a relationship, there must be some healing that needs to happen. Blessings and hope to you as you do the work to be whole again.
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