Divorce after Twenty years together Community Group
I want to start something for those of us that were married for a long long time. I think that we face a little different issues than those who were dating for a few years or even married for shorter period of time. Being married for so long we have older children some have grandkids dealing with teenagers and their reaction to the divorice empty nesters dating after 40...
Hey everyone need a little advise here. How do you handle the X when he continues to say he does't understand why we can't communicate. That you still are harboring a lot of anger. That your not over it and still bitter.
I'm 6 years D and he will be marrying OW next year. He doesn't understand why we can't communicate. I have gone NC for the last 4 years but spent the first 2 trying to communicate to him, whereas, he just blew me off. We have a 25 yr old D who lives with me that is paralyzed and I help her out. I moved out of state and would fill him in on her life and events. He would never respond or communicate back. I did it out of respect that he's her dad. So I quit. I didn't care anymore and they have their own relationship. He is not my friend and has shown no compassion or care for what I deal with on a daily basis with daughter.
He has totally moved on from the get go. Never looked back. I finally decided that I was done. He wasn't coming back and came to realization that he will never be a part of my life again. We are total strangers now. There is no reason for us to communicate. I would be cordial and nice just as I would treat anyone else if I ever had to.
Ok so now, I found out I will be facing a medical condition. Daughter is my rock and support. She told the X and the above was his reaction. He was going to text me after D told him but she said don't bother I have him blocked and really wouldn't want to talk to him. I think he's more concerned about our D and how I will handle her care with this medical procedure and thats why we need to talk.
It just infuriates me to no end that because I refuse to communicate with him that I'm angry, bitter, need to move on. Screw him! How do you all respond to that? Not that I will respond to him, but to those who give you shit like this?
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I had gone to the grocery store. When I wheeled my cartback to my car I just stool there a minute. A few spacesaway a Tesla Cyber truck was parked. I had seen it on theroad a few times for a few seconds. But not close up.It looked like it belonged to 2126 and not 2026. I wasgoing to take a picture of the car but the owners cameback and drove away. It was an ordinary middle age...
Don't sweat his idiotic, selfish comment. He's a dick, will always be a dick and what he says has no impact on your life. I hope you are ok and that your health issue is quickly resolved.
Sending prayers.
and recovery Period go smoothly and quickly.
I Remember more now that you gave details.
What a weasel, has he no shame and is he full
of himself. Is he a narcisstic any chance? HUGS
Second, he's making his problem about you, when it's not. You have decided you do not want a friend who is a liar and a cheat. I felt and still feel the same about my EX. He wanted to continue to call and chat and when he did it was all about him. I did not allow him to know my private life, he doesn't get to share in that. PERIOD. He only wanted to remain "friends" so he could say to others, "we just grew apart, we will always be friends" when asked why we divorced. I lied and covered for him on crap all throughout the marriage, I won't any more. Now I don't hear from him but it's because I took him back to court. It's been nice not dealing with him and proves it's not necessary to be "friends" in the way he wants.
It's up to you on providing him any info with regard to the care of your daughter, my only warning is, this will set a precedence and will be expected in the future. And lets face the facts, we will all be needing procedures in the future. Your daughter is old enough to know what the plan is during that time and can relay that to mr I-want-to-know-it-all-so-I-feel-good-about-myself.
Forgiveness means you have accepted and come to terms with things that happened. I feel I have, but I don't have to continue to be in a relationship with someone who has created a lot of turmoil in my life for no good reason. I wish him all the best and I certainly don't sit around stewing over it. I have a fulfilling life without all the drama he caused. If someone wants to label me as bitter, again, that's on them, not me. (((HUGS)))
Our exes are going to think whatever they want. Right or wrong to justify their actions or just to get a response from us for some perceived slight. Let your daughter talk to him about her condition and you go on about making a life for yourself.
Should just make you feel better that you're not still with him . A person that would even say that to you. the x .....THAT HE CHEATED ON !!! Totally an ass ....and a loser . I wish his new wife luck......she will need it !!!!
Bob
Someday I may date but for now I am happy.
It amazed how their dad would continue to bring it up. He was the one that left me, he left his family. What does it matter what I do.
But somehow this little thing annoyed him.
I'm five years out, raising two teens and still not dating. I don't have the time or the inclination at the moment.
I hope your medical team gets you well soon, and can get you, and your daughter, the help you need while recovering. Sending a prayer.