Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
What do you wish that you could have * do overs*?
My very best friend in the whole world suffered from everything from cancer to lupus. She never complained. But if she had a couple drinks she would talk your ear off for hours about everything else.
One night I went with her and her daughters for a celebration. It turned out to be a horrible night. Mary drank a couple shots of tequila on top of her oxycontins, not good. I was suppose to spend the night that night.
One of her daughters starrted in on her about her being a rotten mother when she was younger and what a rotten life she had had. It was absolutely horrible. I decided to just go home as I knew I would be up all night into the early hours of morning talking her down. I decided to wait and talk to her in the morning.
My phone rang off the hook for atleast three hours. I never bothered to pick it up, I thought I would wait until things had settled a bit.
She died about 3am that morning... Why the fuck could I have not been the friend I should have been? Why didnt I stay and help her through it? She said she was going to go in her house and die. Why didnt I believe it? Thats it.. I wish I would have been there for her... Maybe she would still be here, talking my ear off..
My very best friend in the whole world suffered from everything from cancer to lupus. She never complained. But if she had a couple drinks she would talk your ear off for hours about everything else.
One night I went with her and her daughters for a celebration. It turned out to be a horrible night. Mary drank a couple shots of tequila on top of her oxycontins, not good. I was suppose to spend the night that night.
One of her daughters starrted in on her about her being a rotten mother when she was younger and what a rotten life she had had. It was absolutely horrible. I decided to just go home as I knew I would be up all night into the early hours of morning talking her down. I decided to wait and talk to her in the morning.
My phone rang off the hook for atleast three hours. I never bothered to pick it up, I thought I would wait until things had settled a bit.
She died about 3am that morning... Why the fuck could I have not been the friend I should have been? Why didnt I stay and help her through it? She said she was going to go in her house and die. Why didnt I believe it? Thats it.. I wish I would have been there for her... Maybe she would still be here, talking my ear off..
I wish I could turn back time and stop bullets and needles.
I wish I could make my mother understand that she is amazing, and not responsible for the crap she thinks she is
I wish I was stronger, or had held on to the strength I had when I had it.
I wish I could make it all better, for all of you
I wish I told one of my friends that she was a good friend and how important she was to me before she disappeared, probably from suicide. I also wish I had encouraged her to seek more treatment.
I wish I could have seen through my selfish behavior and went to my daughter's wedding. She was so young, did not know the young man very well, she married right before he went to Iraq. I knew she felt pressured by all sides. I really thought if I did not go, she would not married. Wow, some sense of self importance there. Oh, everything I thought would happen did happen. They ended up divorced. But, I should have been there for her when she needed me.
The guilt of that triggered my self destruction. From there it all went down hill. I just could not forgive myself. I lost everything one I entered that black whole of depression.
However....If we did not have the lowest lows......
How would we recognize the highest highs when we saw them?
I wish I could also do over my mothering... I spent way to much time out instead of with my children. I really wish I could do that one over.... oh yea.................. and my taste in men...,,, thats atleast 10 do overs...
but if wishes were fishes long john silvers would be out of buisness
Oh, one more: I wish I had sought treatment for my depression much, much sooner. I think I really knew (deep down) what it was years before I sought help. (Maybe in the future, there won't be so much stigma attached to it all, and people can get to doctors much earlier---and not lose so much time to this awful thing.)
I wish I could have realized sooner all the things I realize now,.