Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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QPXZ 08/21/2013

I went to the doctor for my depression. My fiancee died and it will be 4 years August 27th. I didn't want drugs so she recommened Lavender as a natural remedy and tole me to email her after a month. It is hard to say how it worked because I went away and forgot them, so it is like starting over. I am very depressed now and I came to the conclusion it is because my life sucks. So how can I tell her that. Stephen made it better even though my past was not so great and now that he is gomne I keep reliving the bad in my past because he is not here to keep it from my mind and make me feel better. I had potential but bad luck and am so tired of life. I don't know how any pill could help unless it makes me muddle through life like a zombie. I would think anyone would be depressed with my life. So how do I tell her that no pill will fix my lousy life. I will wait a week to write to see if the Lavender kicks in. What do I say?

Thanks, QP

reddog201 08/21/2013

i am sorry to hear that.. as for what to say to your dr.... just say what you wrote here. tell her just what u told us..at least it is a start...

QPXZ 08/22/2013

Thanks. I guess I will just tell her that my life sucks and anyone would be depressed if they had my life. I don't know what they do for that.

QP

deleted_user 08/22/2013

If I were you I would find a local support group. Everyone kept trying to get me to go to support groups for a long time. Well after something happened, I had to go (against my will). I actually liked the support groups. It feels so much better when you can connect with people who feel how you feel. Just try going to one support group and if you don't like it, then you don't have to go back. Hang in there :)

ThePepperMan 08/22/2013

A lot of times emotions get all bottled up in us, and create a life of their own. Getting them out, even if it makes no sense, can be a HUGE start.

What some people here do is to print up some of their posts and just show them to their therapist. It can be a great way to get emotions to stabilize long enough for us to start talking. Then, sometimes, once we start talking it just EXPLODES out. Do not worry about it being logical, making sense, or being in any sort of order. Just getting things out is good, and anything that gets that started is perfectly fine!

Gentle hugs

deleted_user 08/25/2013

HI. I also lost my fiance 4 years ago. He was the best man that ever lived. I felt lost, and felt like I was never going to find happiness again. I have been going to grief groups and therapy. Processing through my past and how he made things so much easier, and better, I have come to the conclusion that I will never love again. But I have learned I am ok. He would want me to be happy. So I have found things and ways to do that...until I see him again...
Hugs, Silly

sweatingbullets 08/26/2013

I think I would just say you need to give it more time and this sounds like a good doctor...hold on to this one.

mollgirl 08/26/2013

I am sorry for your loss. I like Peppers idea about printing out your post. This way the Dr. will know how bad it really is. We all need help sometimes. Hugs.

deleted_user 08/26/2013

QPXZ, I am so sorry to hear about your struggles. It sounds like you are really struggling to find anything good in life.

the suggestion of a support group or even a therapist that you can feel comfortable with is a really good one. it's amazing what talking can do.

As for pills.. I can understand not wanting to take something. but your assessment of pills making you into a zombie is.. not true. simply not true. there are a lot of stories on DS about pills helping tremendously. Meds can take the edge off so you can start looking for something meaningful. Of course it's your decision, and I hope the lavender helps, but I know that I would not be on this earth if it wasn't for medication. I was tired too.. i still get tired of life. but the meds can be a lifesaver.

is there a reason you are against meds? What other remedies have you looked at? are you able to exercise?

Keep us posted! I hope you feel better soon.
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QPXZ 08/27/2013

Thank You for all your wonderful replies and good advice. Today is the 4 year anniversary of Stephen's death. Some friends want me to come over to what sounds like a party with a cake too! It is not a celebration. I am not gonna write the doctor now since it is a real bad day. I was on meds and they seemed to help a bit. I am not really against them. It is just I have no money also and think it is my lousy life and not a chemical imbalance making me depressed. I like the suggestions of a support group and after I get through these next few days I will look into it. I was exercising and have to start again. It did help. My job is on hiatus now and I was thinking if I could get a job that I worked a lot it would occupy my mind but I have not had luck there either. I think with the advice here and a few days to think about it I will find the right words for my doctor and if the lavender doesn't kick in maybe some other meds. I used to talk to my neighbor more but she is sick now and I am actually taking care of her some and we don't talk as much. It's just today is a bad day but I expected that..

QP.

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