The last few weeks I've been dealing with a rough breakup on top of being unemployed since late June. On top of that, issues with the unemployment payments in my state mean I still haven't received a single payment. I'm fortunate enough to be able to hold out a little longer, but needless to say it's all taking a toll on me.
Now throughout all of this my dad and sister have been periodically checking in (my mom passed 7 years ago), and while my sister has been helpful, my dad just tries to give me solutions that don't really take into account the reality of the situation. Last night, one of his check-ins with me blew up into a fight because of this.
He basically said I wasn't trying hard enough to get a job, that I should just look for jobs in every state and move if necessary. He repeatedly says "what do you even have there, anyway?" which is real awesome to hear considering I do have friends nearby and like where I live (vs. moving where I know no one).
He also says that I'm "avoiding responsibility" when I tell him my state's unemployment system is broken and backed up. And this is after I explained how I've contacted them at least 5 times and no one can help other than saying my turn will come. I also apply for at least one job every single day (and 2 or more on good days). So it's not like I'm just twiddling my thumbs.
Well, as soon as I pushed back on not taking responsibility, he just hung up on me. It felt awful, and it only got worse when i had the realization that this is the kind of thing I'd immediately talk to my ex about. She knew me and my relationship with him, and I know she would have been on my side. Not having that really just made things worse in the moment.
I ended up thinking about it a lot today. It was really really difficult not to feel defeated and like I'm doing things wrong. But that wasn't the end of it.
On top of all of that, I managed to walk to the drugstore on my street at the exact time my ex was riding her bike home from what I assume was her allergy shots at the hospital just a bit north of me. We don't live near each other in the city, and the appointment could literally be any day of the week at whatever hour, and I managed to go out right when she was riding my direction.
Neither of us reacted but I know she saw me. It was the first time I've seen her since the breakup, and emotionally it was weird. A very tiny piece of me felt happy to see her while the other 98% was even more upset.
It was one of the weirdest and most difficult days I've had in a while.
I often struggle with anxiety. I feel great sometimes and other times I don't know why Im not happy and dont enjoy anything. People trying to talk to me and my anxiety goes up. I am on 10mg of lexapro...anybody had good experience with this?
Hey Everyone, I just joined this group today. I wanted to give a little background on myself. I've had anxiety since I was a child, and I'm 33 now. I've been on an antidepressant since 18. I usually have panic attacks and come out of them unscathed. However, this is the second time in two years that I've had a generalized anxiety episode. It's been going on now for two months. I upped my meds...