It states that scoliosis is 1/3 genetic and 2/3 environmental... it isn't passed directly down from your parents. Isn't what i described about my situation exactly these environmental factors that played a role in my scoliosis? Having had underweight and maybe poor nutrition, bad sitting positions and maybe lack of minerals... isn't this ultimately what got me my 20° S curve scoliosis? I understand that noone knows where it's from. But it can't be 100% out of control for people to get scoliosis. (Im talking about the adolescent idiopathic ones) surely a child scoliosis is not anyones fault and it will unfortunately get worse until the child develops a rather bad case of scoliosis.
But for me it was detected when i was 19 years old. My back was normal in older pictures... isn't the hunger that i had, and the extreme anxiety coupled with the angry refusal to eat something in the past, the cause of my scoliosis?
By the way lets talk about this. Back then i was in a school that i really hated with annoying noisy people and i was also bullied by one person.. i think they even stole the lamp of my bicycle once lol. I dont really care about that. I had the full range of anxiety and my stomach felt sick all the time. My mouth was dry and i had a bad taste so i couldnt eat anything. Soon all this moved to after school life. My mind was racing all the time and i became angry. So... i decided not to eat anything even though i was hungry when coming home.. soon i became so thin that i had underweight of only 55 kg and i could hardly eat. There were a few times when i ate at home and i couldnt. My mom forced me to eat and then i suddenly puked because i was full. Hungry but full. It didnt work. And my parents also shouted at me for puking and for some of my bad grades...
Later i got sent to mental hospital and now i take olanzapin and sertralin. They said i had indifferent schizophrenia, asperger and psychosis. I had a weight gain once 10 kg in a week and now my weight is totally normal. And the new school is still uncomfortable but i get sort of good grades and it works... but that damn scoliosos!! I think it's my fault. I should have eaten something! Instead i decided to lay in bed all the time and listen to music... im so stupid.
Ollie Ollie oxen free!! Come out come out wherever you are! Surely there are more people lurking here than we are seeing. So please check in, let us know you are here. How has your week been? Do you have plans for the coming weekend? What’s on your mind? You are missed :)
Minday in therapy I shared a memory I recalled where I witnessed a sexual assault on my mother by my biological father. So I also shared memories I had where my father was violent or abusive during my childhood. I got so worked up that I was shaking. I never shared ANY of that with anyone, even my first therapist who I trusted implicitly. I processed some of the emotions I felt then and now. My...