Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Hi Everyone,
A few months ago I posted here looking for advice from all of you so I can help my depressed husband. I took your advice (thank you all). Long story short, I have been dealing with my husband's depression for 8 yrs. now. I have been supportive, loving and caring through all of his tantrums, anger, rage and isolation periods.
This last year he has completely ignored me and rejected me at every turn. There is nothing I can say or do to get him close to me. He is not cheating because all he does is goes to work, come home and play X-Box for hours. This is his escape. I have provided him tons of information on depression but this just sends him off the deep end denying that he is depressed. Gets him very angry!
A little family background..his mother, father, brother, grandfather are depressed. My husband was also diagnosed with depression as a teen. He says that his depression was cured!
This is my question...Where do I go from here? I have a man in my life that I love dearly that refuses to get help and is devasting my life.
I seeked out emotional help myself because I felt all of this was making me feel like crap. Unloved, ignored, at fault etc.
I'm reaching out to all of you because unfortunately you live with depression and understand this better.
Thank you for your advice!
A few months ago I posted here looking for advice from all of you so I can help my depressed husband. I took your advice (thank you all). Long story short, I have been dealing with my husband's depression for 8 yrs. now. I have been supportive, loving and caring through all of his tantrums, anger, rage and isolation periods.
This last year he has completely ignored me and rejected me at every turn. There is nothing I can say or do to get him close to me. He is not cheating because all he does is goes to work, come home and play X-Box for hours. This is his escape. I have provided him tons of information on depression but this just sends him off the deep end denying that he is depressed. Gets him very angry!
A little family background..his mother, father, brother, grandfather are depressed. My husband was also diagnosed with depression as a teen. He says that his depression was cured!
This is my question...Where do I go from here? I have a man in my life that I love dearly that refuses to get help and is devasting my life.
I seeked out emotional help myself because I felt all of this was making me feel like crap. Unloved, ignored, at fault etc.
I'm reaching out to all of you because unfortunately you live with depression and understand this better.
Thank you for your advice!
will he go see a therapist? does he want this marriage to continue with out him?
Not get help, be depressed, play his xbox all day long, and yu could continue to love him and be with him the rest of his life like this?
If the marriage is #2 or #3 on either of your lists, then both of you have to take a step back and re-evaluate your commitment to each other and your desire to repair and maintain the marriage a all costs.
This last year the marriage turned into a nightmare. I also find myself being very different from when all of this first started.
I am emotionally and physically exhausted! After seeking counseling myself and realizing that this is not my fault I have become angry at him. I feel everything I have done went unappreciated.
The thing that conflicts me the most is that some information on depressed spouses say to leave if they refuse help and others say to stand by them and support them fully until they realize they need help.
It's been over a year now and things are worse. Communication has become impossible. He gets angry and defensive when I try to talk to him.
i know this is far easier said than done - you are having to risk your marriage with him if you take this approach. but by what you have said it sounds to me like you would agree that the marriage (as it is now) is making you crazy, is making yo depressed.
so i'm not saying get out of it - but i am saying let him know what ultimately is at stake. you love him, but you need him to get serious about getting better. & anyway, if you love him, why wouldn't you want him to happy?
Does he still want the marriage hun? Has he given up too?
I really appreciate your advice!
Thank you!
And are yu considering trying any of the replies here?
When i was married i was the one treeating my wife badly. She had enough and told me flat out either i get help or ill find myself divorced. It was the wake up call i needed and i went and got evaluated and started on meds. I am a much better person in general because of it.
The replies to keep on him about counseling was what I needed.
Trust me all, after dealing with this for over one year it gets exhausting. I was just about ready to give up on him.
I will say that I will not compromise on counseling anymore. Firstly, he needs help; Lastly, I deserve a happy and healthy life.
Thank you all again
What does his family say about it? Maybe they can talk to him since they have been diagnosed.