Some days I love life and have so much energy. I am able to get up and go to work and communicate with my customers, and smile. Some days I can come home and clean my house or finish the laundry thats been piling up for days now. Some days I can come home and make dinner. Some days I can go out with friends and make conversation and even laugh, and mean it. But, most days, this is not the case. Most days my alarm goes off and I quickly hit the snooze button, over and over. Most days I have to drag myself out of bed and find the courage to take my medications. Most days I have to wear a fake smile at work and pray for my shift to be over soon. Most days I come home and sit in the dark with my eyes closed, but still cant sleep. Most days I either come home and eat the whole fridge, or go days without eating anything. Most days I cry and cry and nothing I do brings me comfort. Most days I hide my fresh cuts under a long sleeve or jeans. Most days I pray to god to end my life now so I dont have to feel this pain anymore. 

I live for the few days I can pretend im okay. Look happy and feel beautiful.